Puppy Love

Last night I thought about our lives together...Let me start with the choosing of him. I knew exactly what I wanted and wouldn't settle for less. I drove around the whole state of Florida for about two months until I found the perfect one for me. On that very lucky day, I pulled up to the house, walked up to the door as two men greeted me. They then walked me around back to first show me the father...I was amazed when I saw him, he was about 90 pounds of pure muscle, K9 trained in German and the most obedient dog I’ve ever seen. He then showed me all the paperwork and taught me about this bloodline.
We then walked around the corner to see thirteen of the most adorable puppies I’ve ever seen. I just sat and watched as they played. I knew what to look for in this breed, I didn't want the largest or the runt. I didn't want the troublemaker either. There running by him playing alone was the one I had my eye on, he was perfect.... As I bent down, the puppies all ran towards me and began kissing and chewing on my shoes, he was in his own world. I then whistled to him and he looked up and ran to me, busting through the crowd to show me he was the boss. "Yup, that's the one" I said. I still needed to wait another week before I could take home my baby.
The day had arrived; I had bought all the supplies and was on my way to pick him up. As I arrived to the house, they once again showed me all the puppies and I was glad the choice I made. From that day on, he was my best friend. Many weekends were planned with him involved, boating, heading to the beach (he loved the water), to the lake, on bike rides, and so on. I took him everywhere! From the first day home, I had him on my couch (big mistake) he didn’t move the whole first day off it. But as the years past, and over 20 couches LOL that was his place. All of my houses had a couch next to the front window, and by the looks of my couch, he stayed there the whole day waiting for me to get home. He had a way of knowing if you were you were a good person, or a bad one. He would make known if he didn’t trust you by sitting across the room and staring at you on the corner of his eye. When he was about 6 months old, I had him K9 trained as well, he could protect, search (for whatever ex: clothing, money, drugs, bones and so on). This dog loved to make me proud...we would go for bike rides, well actually he would pull me for two miles every day...when I take out the leash, he had to grab it and run to the front door and just sit and wait. Knowing a car ride would follow shortly. As many more years past, he had some medical issues but none of that mattered to me that was more or less my son.
Almost thirteen years later, I find myself in a very tough spot. He has been diagnosed with Cushins disease and has rapidly been getting weaker, and has lost a good amount of his hair. Many if they were to see him now, wouldn't know the great life we shared together by looking at him. This dog has won many first place trophies (best of show, search, sled pulling competitions), but if you saw this frail dog, you wouldn't know how much he means to me. We sometimes judge someone from their outside appearances but seldom think of the lives they once led. I had decided that today was the day I would put him to rest, but as I picked up the phone to make the call, he walked to me that very moment, and the phone was busy. I then walked away from him (as for him not to hear my call) and he once again came to me, put his head on my lap and kissed me. He hadn't walked all weekend, or eaten much at all.... but today he ate his food, followed me around and gave me the look of "please not today"! So today I brought him around with me, we drove for hours.... I could see the happiness in his eyes, when I first grabbed the leash. He seemed at peace today. I just couldn't do it!! I asked when would be the right time and they replied, " When the quality of life has diminished, when they no longer can perform daily tasks, and most important, stop eating". Well today he has walked, eaten and peed without me carrying him outside. It is just so very hard. It is one thing to come home to him not alive, but to take a life? I'm just not ready yet. What if he just was lazy today and had months to go? Well, my thought process has been dedicated to him this weekend, so there is not much dating going on. Sorry to talk about this, but I cant tell anyone without crying.... and I can't let them see me cry!
The Man