Dead and Gone

Is Miami dead and gone? As I was planning my next trip (dates are secret. I prefer an ambush attack this time) I found myself questioning if I really wanted to spend another vacation here. Then I had another funny question why had I been going here to begin with? What had been the allure all those years ago? Then I remembered why. M. Which then brought on another funny question, who is M? After a second I remembered. M is the jackass sewer rat that started this entire writing bug. What happened between M and I? Oh, that's right. The lust, the affair, the "fun girl" label, the wedding, the kids, the forbidden fruit, the break up, the cowardly lion. How silly of me to have forgotten who M was.
How far I have come in such a short period. I can barely remember his real name these days. When I attempt to remember our history together the flashbacks are no longer relevant. I could walk right past him today and not even do a double take.
So I come back to the original question, why Miami? Yes, the city is sexy in certain parts and in others it could be anywhere U.S.A. I've never been a big fan of clubs or staying out until 5 am partying so that type of nightlife doesn't intrigue me. I have my favorite bars, restaurants, and shops and for the most part I visit the same haunts.
In recent trips I have created my own memories and made new friends and acquaintances. When I stopped in the other week to one of my popular restaurants, I felt like I was at Cheers. Everyone knew my name, the bartender was already making me a drink and the Chef came out to greet me. M and company could have been sitting right next to me and I wouldn't have cared, I was home.
But, there is a whole world of other places just like this. So, why have I been limiting myself to this particular place? In the past there was an allure besides the palm trees and beaches, but even then the Miami I saw thru M's eyes is far from the heart of the seductive and glamorous version I call home.
Everyone gets in their ruts and sometimes the comfort of the expected is more relaxing then exploring a new frontier. Since, this month is all about changes I wonder if I need a time out from the sunshine state and this time it's because I want to not because I don't want to run into the sewer rats.
Kate