Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Homecoming
“Welcome to Miami International Airport where the current time is now 1:19pm. It was our pleasure to serve you and we look forward to seeing you on a future flight. If Miami is your final destination, welcome home. “
I always have butterflies in my stomach the day I’m flying. This feeling like it’s the first day of school, nervous but really excited. Today was no exception. I enjoy the rush, the anticipation of getting to my final destination. The worrying if my luggage will make it. In recent years I have become accustomed to first class. For the most part thanks to my father’s excess miles from traveling for business so often. I’m a bit spoiled at this point; it truly is so much more enjoyable. Besides the extra leg room, leather seats, hot towels, warm just baked cookies, real china and food that I would actually order, there aren’t screaming children kicking me or people going to sleep with their seat in my lap. I’m reminded of the scene in Jerry Maguire where Renee Zellenger is eavesdropping in on a conversation between Tom Cruise and a woman and then leans over to her super adorable son with the extra large round glasses and says, “They use to just have better food, now they have better lives.” Perception is key.
What I didn’t figure in today was that I wasn’t departing from my normal city. On today’s flight I was sitting next to some big shot hotel owner who for the thirty minutes we were sitting on the runway was yelling at someone on the phone. Behind me I had two married men discussing their misadventures in flying and work for the entire three hours and twenty minutes we were in the air.
My favorite words are when the pilot says, “Flight attendants prepare for landing.” That’s when the real rush sets in. The butterflies come back and all I want to do is run off the plane regardless of if someone is waiting for me.
Growing up as an only child of two busy parents, I’ve become use to living on my own. Making my own rules and accustomed to traveling solo. In main ways I prefer it. I go where I want, when I want. It’s a fabulous solitary state for a few days. A perfect time to write read and just be me.
My recent routine when I visit Miami is to take a walk on the beach, sit by the pool for a couple hours, then go for a leisurely lunch at Green Street in the Grove, a cat nap and then out for dinner and drinks into the early morning hours.
I’m excited to see the new restaurant Lulu that opened across the street from Green Street. When I was there in the winter they had just began construction and the soft opening pictures of the interior and food look fab.
Today thou I’m off on a new adventure to a place I haven’t visited in almost thirteen years, a one-night excursion to a tropical paradise at the very southern tip of Florida. I’m not going by the books on this trip. This isn’t a typical trip. I’m not traveling alone. I’ve got company. The entourage, so to speak, has grown. So, now I’m tempting fate, changing up my routines, my haunts, and my locales and possibly encountering the cowardly lion and company. I’ve got the suits behind me this time and life sure is sweet.
Let the fun in the sun begin!
Kate
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Paper Reality
“I used to believe in forever, but forever is too good to be true.” Winnie the Pooh
The original point of this writing exercise at least for me was to make peace with the past and to free my mind from the tortured ghosts. It would seem that I have accomplished this objective. I have in the last few days turned my focus to working on the rough draft of the book. Which on it's own is a pretty awesome objective and certainly not something I ever really thought I would be saying I was doing. The biggest change I had noticed is that the people that had been the main focus of my blog posts over the last few months and who will also be a large part of the book no longer are people I know. There is no emotional connection with them anymore. Which is a fantastic feeling. I question if I would even notice them on the street anymore. Now, when I see their names on paper I don't get a cold feeling. Instead I feel nothing. My mind is no longer bias against them. It's a fascinating process developing the people who were once a part of my life into a reality on paper.
There are times when I still don't really understand what happened. There is the obvious and I do get that now and wonder why I didn't see the train wreck barreling towards me for months prior. But, I had been wearing rose colored glasses for years so I never had a chance. For the most part everything that happened makes perfect sense now. Everything that is except for the slandering remarks and unproductive shit storm of words that occurred earlier this month. But, what is done is done. Like I said before I forgive M and company and now I have began to forget them, but I have a feeling they won't be forgetting me any time soon. Gotta love karma, it really is a bitch.
The best part of this writing exercise is that I finally get it. There will always be an unsolved mystery in regards to M and company and I'm starting to enjoy the allure again. For the most part I am glad I met M and I'm quite fine having a "fun girl" label. I prefer it actually. I am a fun girl. I'm not a married, mother of two, one day I will be (well not married I hope) but with kids. For now thou I'm enjoying being free from the baggage, jealously, insecurity and emotional land mine that comes with married life. Like me, love me or hate me. I'm not changing for you. So there.
Kate
The original point of this writing exercise at least for me was to make peace with the past and to free my mind from the tortured ghosts. It would seem that I have accomplished this objective. I have in the last few days turned my focus to working on the rough draft of the book. Which on it's own is a pretty awesome objective and certainly not something I ever really thought I would be saying I was doing. The biggest change I had noticed is that the people that had been the main focus of my blog posts over the last few months and who will also be a large part of the book no longer are people I know. There is no emotional connection with them anymore. Which is a fantastic feeling. I question if I would even notice them on the street anymore. Now, when I see their names on paper I don't get a cold feeling. Instead I feel nothing. My mind is no longer bias against them. It's a fascinating process developing the people who were once a part of my life into a reality on paper.
There are times when I still don't really understand what happened. There is the obvious and I do get that now and wonder why I didn't see the train wreck barreling towards me for months prior. But, I had been wearing rose colored glasses for years so I never had a chance. For the most part everything that happened makes perfect sense now. Everything that is except for the slandering remarks and unproductive shit storm of words that occurred earlier this month. But, what is done is done. Like I said before I forgive M and company and now I have began to forget them, but I have a feeling they won't be forgetting me any time soon. Gotta love karma, it really is a bitch.
The best part of this writing exercise is that I finally get it. There will always be an unsolved mystery in regards to M and company and I'm starting to enjoy the allure again. For the most part I am glad I met M and I'm quite fine having a "fun girl" label. I prefer it actually. I am a fun girl. I'm not a married, mother of two, one day I will be (well not married I hope) but with kids. For now thou I'm enjoying being free from the baggage, jealously, insecurity and emotional land mine that comes with married life. Like me, love me or hate me. I'm not changing for you. So there.
Kate
Mr. Rogers
On this little side street off of Bleecker in the village is the most adorable jewelry shop. Each piece is handcrafted, reasonably priced for the most part, one of a kind gorgeous jewels. This truly is my candy shop. Kate stumbled upon it last Christmas. Here's the link for all the ladies and all the smart men out there: www.lorimclean.com. They have an online store too. I'm not getting paid for this advertisement, although I sure should after what I spent today.
I restrained myself from walking into Marc Jacobs and Magnolia Bakery (yes the one in the infamous Sex and the City episode). Honestly, I'm not a big fan of their cupcakes. I stood in line on day to see what the buzz was about and after thirty minutes and being felt up by little children and a older man all crowded into this tiny little shop I walked out with half a dozen Suzy Home Maker sweets. Definitely not worth the sweat, time or pat down.
While walking on Bleecker towards Eleventh Street I walked literally right past Kiefer Sutherland. The man is gorgeous in person. I did a double take; no one seemed to notice him. He's about 5'8", clean shaven, wearing aviators, a white T-shirt, and light wash jeans, didn't look at the shoes. Had dinner last night next to the woman who hosts a show on the Travel channel. You know the one where she travels to all these fabulous resorts in the most exotic places and gets paid. She was piss drunk, which was rather amusing to watch.
This might be the last post for the month and since we begin June on a sour note, I thought we should close on a warm, fuzzy and over the top cheesy one. By the way, if you haven't figured it out yet we all have super dry senses of humor. So every time you see a phrase like painfully gorgeous heels it's our suddle way of saying FU to the pissing parade. We have no problem making fun of yourselves. Life is an endless fun factory if you have thick skin. Those that don't are the ones who try to break you down, because unfortunately they don't understand our words or the fact we are able to laugh at life.
With that said here's a cheery little melody that I'm sure many of you are very familiar with. Can you guess who originally sang this childhood favorite?
"It's a beautiful day in this neighborhood,
A beautiful day for a neighbor.
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
It's a neighborly day in this beauty wood,
A neighborly day for a beauty.
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
I've always wanted to have a neighbor just like you.
I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you.
So, let's make the most of this beautiful day.
Since we're together we might as well say:
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
Won't you be my neighbor?
Won't you please,
Won't you please?
Please won't you be my neighbor?"
Kate better have some juicy gossip from the sunshine state because between The Man and myself we are starting to seem more like boring married folks. (no offense to those that have said I Do)
SP
I restrained myself from walking into Marc Jacobs and Magnolia Bakery (yes the one in the infamous Sex and the City episode). Honestly, I'm not a big fan of their cupcakes. I stood in line on day to see what the buzz was about and after thirty minutes and being felt up by little children and a older man all crowded into this tiny little shop I walked out with half a dozen Suzy Home Maker sweets. Definitely not worth the sweat, time or pat down.
While walking on Bleecker towards Eleventh Street I walked literally right past Kiefer Sutherland. The man is gorgeous in person. I did a double take; no one seemed to notice him. He's about 5'8", clean shaven, wearing aviators, a white T-shirt, and light wash jeans, didn't look at the shoes. Had dinner last night next to the woman who hosts a show on the Travel channel. You know the one where she travels to all these fabulous resorts in the most exotic places and gets paid. She was piss drunk, which was rather amusing to watch.
This might be the last post for the month and since we begin June on a sour note, I thought we should close on a warm, fuzzy and over the top cheesy one. By the way, if you haven't figured it out yet we all have super dry senses of humor. So every time you see a phrase like painfully gorgeous heels it's our suddle way of saying FU to the pissing parade. We have no problem making fun of yourselves. Life is an endless fun factory if you have thick skin. Those that don't are the ones who try to break you down, because unfortunately they don't understand our words or the fact we are able to laugh at life.
With that said here's a cheery little melody that I'm sure many of you are very familiar with. Can you guess who originally sang this childhood favorite?
"It's a beautiful day in this neighborhood,
A beautiful day for a neighbor.
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
It's a neighborly day in this beauty wood,
A neighborly day for a beauty.
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
I've always wanted to have a neighbor just like you.
I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you.
So, let's make the most of this beautiful day.
Since we're together we might as well say:
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
Won't you be my neighbor?
Won't you please,
Won't you please?
Please won't you be my neighbor?"
Kate better have some juicy gossip from the sunshine state because between The Man and myself we are starting to seem more like boring married folks. (no offense to those that have said I Do)
SP
Agent Provocateur
I left work early yesterday and spent the afternoon in my version of Candyland, Bloomingdales. I've been on the hunt for a new wallet for months now. I hate the ones that are a walking billboard for the designer, with the monogram exterior design. Which pretty much sums up everything on the market.
So like I was saying I went into Bloomingdales with this one objective, a new wallet. Of course, I walked out with a fabulous pair of cherry red sunglasses (which I kind of had been looking for too, but I didn't need a new pair). And since I was in the candy shop, I figured I should tour the facilities and see what other sweets were available. Which then brought me to the intimates department (code for lingerie). I'm also very particular about my undergarments. I hate the padded, wired, frilly, girly bras. I'm more a Calvin Klein sports bra kind of gal. As simple as it comes. But, there was nothing and just as I'm about to leave I notice a separate corner with Agent Provocateur pieces. I've never been in one of their stores and I've never spent more that thirty dollars on a bra, but oh my god drop dead gorgeous and so sexy bras and matching briefs.
Take your minds out of the gutter boys. Yes, there was some topless action in the dressing room. Okay, let your imagination go wild. There was also another woman in the changing room the sales associate. Yea, that was a first for me too.
This super sweet twenty something woman wearing the brands uniform of what looks like a sexed up flight attendants uniform an all black, short sleeve button up dress. But, what stood out the most was her gothic eye makeup. Dark blue and black eyeliner and a dramatic extended crescent design. It actually looked very sexy on her, slightly kinky if I went that way. (Which I don't) So, like I was saying the sales associate was incredibly helpful and while I don't really have a need for more lingerie, I walked out with four different matching bra and brief sets.
So back to the wallet search. I literally looked at each wallet by every designer. Nothing that I loved and then I found it. Simple, small, solid light gray, no designer branding.
On my way out for dinner with a girlfriend last night, I moved the contents of my wallet into the new one. To discover that it's a bull shit wallet. I had two bills in it and one card in each slot and the freaking Italian leather accessory wouldn't snap shut. So, back to square one on the hunt for a new wallet.
Sorry, if this was a bore to read. Life is pretty normal these days, no drama or excitement. Yes, I know if this is my biggest issue, then I'm a very lucky woman.
SP
So like I was saying I went into Bloomingdales with this one objective, a new wallet. Of course, I walked out with a fabulous pair of cherry red sunglasses (which I kind of had been looking for too, but I didn't need a new pair). And since I was in the candy shop, I figured I should tour the facilities and see what other sweets were available. Which then brought me to the intimates department (code for lingerie). I'm also very particular about my undergarments. I hate the padded, wired, frilly, girly bras. I'm more a Calvin Klein sports bra kind of gal. As simple as it comes. But, there was nothing and just as I'm about to leave I notice a separate corner with Agent Provocateur pieces. I've never been in one of their stores and I've never spent more that thirty dollars on a bra, but oh my god drop dead gorgeous and so sexy bras and matching briefs.
Take your minds out of the gutter boys. Yes, there was some topless action in the dressing room. Okay, let your imagination go wild. There was also another woman in the changing room the sales associate. Yea, that was a first for me too.
This super sweet twenty something woman wearing the brands uniform of what looks like a sexed up flight attendants uniform an all black, short sleeve button up dress. But, what stood out the most was her gothic eye makeup. Dark blue and black eyeliner and a dramatic extended crescent design. It actually looked very sexy on her, slightly kinky if I went that way. (Which I don't) So, like I was saying the sales associate was incredibly helpful and while I don't really have a need for more lingerie, I walked out with four different matching bra and brief sets.
So back to the wallet search. I literally looked at each wallet by every designer. Nothing that I loved and then I found it. Simple, small, solid light gray, no designer branding.
On my way out for dinner with a girlfriend last night, I moved the contents of my wallet into the new one. To discover that it's a bull shit wallet. I had two bills in it and one card in each slot and the freaking Italian leather accessory wouldn't snap shut. So, back to square one on the hunt for a new wallet.
Sorry, if this was a bore to read. Life is pretty normal these days, no drama or excitement. Yes, I know if this is my biggest issue, then I'm a very lucky woman.
SP
Monday, June 28, 2010
Burnt Out
Candy wiped me out???? Hahahhaahhaaa!! Naaa, not with my sweet tooth. I have just come to a point where I realized I am not happy. I might use the easiness to my advantage and in turn may have become a type of JSR. The biggest difference is that if I am not interested in someone, I don't show interest. I don't go out of my way, never make plans, and sometimes only call when I don't have better plans.
Recently things have become easier that ever before. For example: on the site I am on, I had someone write to me. They were attractive, but not my exact "type". I had nothing to do so we decided to meet. As we walked towards each other, I knew this one wasn't for me. (Attractive but a little heavier than I like) not fat, not skinny, but "thick" as some say. As we proceeded to have a few drinks, she wanted to ask me a question: (her) "I can tell you are not really interested in me, but we are adults and if you wanted to share some good adult fun, I would not expect a phone call" (Me) I was amazed by her honesty and asked how she knew. She then told me it was my posture and the look as she approached. Now with that in mind, I already knew how the night could end. Those are the words any man would love to hear...
Example 2: I had been talking back and forth, met her once, had a slight attraction, but again, NOT WIFE OR GF MATERIAL. We still shared phone calls, decided to be friends, and then received this text: "Hey, I just wanted to say, I know why we didn't go out after we first met. I just wanted to say, I know I will not be your future wife, but I am sexually attracted to you and we could have "fun" whenever you want. (Me) You always invited me out with you, I have been really busy with work (lied because I didn't want to hurt her feelings) I think you and I would have fun if it went to a different level but, (LADIES PAY ATTENTION TO THIS) I am not looking for anything serious at this point and I didn’t want to hurt you. I know how I am and that if I went over to your house to watch a movie, like you suggested, I think something may happen between us. I don’t want to ruin our friendship over sex. (Her) I am a big girl and can handle it! That's why I wanted you over...not to watch a movie.
I just don't know what to do anymore.... I want a committed relationship, but just haven’t found "the one”. Am I supposed to turn this down? I am just as lonely as they are. Why are all these offers coming my way? Does this happen to everyone? I am just lost in an environment based on lustful thoughts and infatuations. Sure, it is a great feeling to feel this wanted...but I sometimes think of their feelings. I stated the truth, told them there was no future, they would be "fun” and they accept with no regrets, but somehow I feel wrong to be doing this. Men are generally a sex-based creature as women are driven on an emotional stimulation. Do I attract all women who don't care about mental stimulation? Maybe women have changed after all these years I was in my relationship...maybe it is the age...that knows!
It's just the same old stories. I think I'm going to give up on dating for a while and save money...adding it up, I could buy a Ferrari or something with what I save every weekend...then maybe I can get a woman I am more attracted to...Naaa, j/k. but I am so tired of the B.S
The Man
Recently things have become easier that ever before. For example: on the site I am on, I had someone write to me. They were attractive, but not my exact "type". I had nothing to do so we decided to meet. As we walked towards each other, I knew this one wasn't for me. (Attractive but a little heavier than I like) not fat, not skinny, but "thick" as some say. As we proceeded to have a few drinks, she wanted to ask me a question: (her) "I can tell you are not really interested in me, but we are adults and if you wanted to share some good adult fun, I would not expect a phone call" (Me) I was amazed by her honesty and asked how she knew. She then told me it was my posture and the look as she approached. Now with that in mind, I already knew how the night could end. Those are the words any man would love to hear...
Example 2: I had been talking back and forth, met her once, had a slight attraction, but again, NOT WIFE OR GF MATERIAL. We still shared phone calls, decided to be friends, and then received this text: "Hey, I just wanted to say, I know why we didn't go out after we first met. I just wanted to say, I know I will not be your future wife, but I am sexually attracted to you and we could have "fun" whenever you want. (Me) You always invited me out with you, I have been really busy with work (lied because I didn't want to hurt her feelings) I think you and I would have fun if it went to a different level but, (LADIES PAY ATTENTION TO THIS) I am not looking for anything serious at this point and I didn’t want to hurt you. I know how I am and that if I went over to your house to watch a movie, like you suggested, I think something may happen between us. I don’t want to ruin our friendship over sex. (Her) I am a big girl and can handle it! That's why I wanted you over...not to watch a movie.
I just don't know what to do anymore.... I want a committed relationship, but just haven’t found "the one”. Am I supposed to turn this down? I am just as lonely as they are. Why are all these offers coming my way? Does this happen to everyone? I am just lost in an environment based on lustful thoughts and infatuations. Sure, it is a great feeling to feel this wanted...but I sometimes think of their feelings. I stated the truth, told them there was no future, they would be "fun” and they accept with no regrets, but somehow I feel wrong to be doing this. Men are generally a sex-based creature as women are driven on an emotional stimulation. Do I attract all women who don't care about mental stimulation? Maybe women have changed after all these years I was in my relationship...maybe it is the age...that knows!
It's just the same old stories. I think I'm going to give up on dating for a while and save money...adding it up, I could buy a Ferrari or something with what I save every weekend...then maybe I can get a woman I am more attracted to...Naaa, j/k. but I am so tired of the B.S
The Man
Golden Girls
A gentleman exudes confidence in everything he does, but never arrogance. A gentleman respects those below him as much as he does those above him. A gentleman understands that chivalry has not died, but been forgotten and is driven to bring it back into the light. A gentleman understands a woman's desires and strives to achieve them all. A gentleman understands you get back what you send out, and only sends out the best. A gentleman values intelligence, a gentleman values morals, a gentleman values quality, a gentleman values love, a gentleman values his enemies as much as his friends, a gentleman values life and it's many splendors.
The twenty million dollar question is, where are all the gentlemen?
Didn't intend to post anything today, but then I can't predict what will happen five minutes from now, so I probably shouldn't guarantee anything.
Sonoma gal is alive. I was starting to think she locked herself in the wine cellar and was drinking herself silly. Then this morning I got confirmation that she is very much alive and hasn't lost her sarcastic spunk in spite of the emotional roller coaster that is now reality.
There is something to be said for being the advisor for years and then one day being the one asking for advice and words of wisdom. The band of brothers (or in this case band of sisters) truly is the front line against all the JSRs in the world. When you hurt one of us, you become the number one enemy for us all.
Sonoma Gal aka V "Hey! I've been adrift the last few days and have dropped all my communication with everyone to regain my balance. No phone, Internet. Just me. It has been rather liberating and painful in the same breath. Just got to read the blog and I am so excited for you! Have a blast at your bash, it will be a fantastic success and I'll be at the next one. I promise. I also was able to read the entry about us and was genuinely touched. Memories came flooding back like I was twenty-one again. It was my honor to read about us and remember what true friends that we have been over the span of years and years. It seems there is something fantastic to be said about friendship that requires nothing more than listening and on occasion being able to tell each other the much needed truth. I'm glad to have you in my life. Now start singing The Golden Girls theme song..."Thank you for being' a friend, traveled down the road and back again, my heart is true - your a friend and a confidant!" - Ha-ha! I had to have a laugh at my own sappy sake!!! I may have been knocked down but I am not out!!! I will never let any man break me and neither will you. You've reminded me that having a sense of humor about these things is helpful. Give 'em hell in Miami and make some memories for that book!!! Always, V."
Me "She's alive!! J was about ready to go on a treasure hunt for you. It will get better in time. Everything happens for a reason. You made me cry and how often does that happen. You bet ya I'm going to kick some ass. I'm wicked excited for the little bash and I expect you to be the ringleader of the next one. With Love, Kate."
Have a fabulous day everyone and yes I've got some painfully gorgeous heels on. (Manolos to be exact)
Kate
The twenty million dollar question is, where are all the gentlemen?
Didn't intend to post anything today, but then I can't predict what will happen five minutes from now, so I probably shouldn't guarantee anything.
Sonoma gal is alive. I was starting to think she locked herself in the wine cellar and was drinking herself silly. Then this morning I got confirmation that she is very much alive and hasn't lost her sarcastic spunk in spite of the emotional roller coaster that is now reality.
There is something to be said for being the advisor for years and then one day being the one asking for advice and words of wisdom. The band of brothers (or in this case band of sisters) truly is the front line against all the JSRs in the world. When you hurt one of us, you become the number one enemy for us all.
Sonoma Gal aka V "Hey! I've been adrift the last few days and have dropped all my communication with everyone to regain my balance. No phone, Internet. Just me. It has been rather liberating and painful in the same breath. Just got to read the blog and I am so excited for you! Have a blast at your bash, it will be a fantastic success and I'll be at the next one. I promise. I also was able to read the entry about us and was genuinely touched. Memories came flooding back like I was twenty-one again. It was my honor to read about us and remember what true friends that we have been over the span of years and years. It seems there is something fantastic to be said about friendship that requires nothing more than listening and on occasion being able to tell each other the much needed truth. I'm glad to have you in my life. Now start singing The Golden Girls theme song..."Thank you for being' a friend, traveled down the road and back again, my heart is true - your a friend and a confidant!" - Ha-ha! I had to have a laugh at my own sappy sake!!! I may have been knocked down but I am not out!!! I will never let any man break me and neither will you. You've reminded me that having a sense of humor about these things is helpful. Give 'em hell in Miami and make some memories for that book!!! Always, V."
Me "She's alive!! J was about ready to go on a treasure hunt for you. It will get better in time. Everything happens for a reason. You made me cry and how often does that happen. You bet ya I'm going to kick some ass. I'm wicked excited for the little bash and I expect you to be the ringleader of the next one. With Love, Kate."
Have a fabulous day everyone and yes I've got some painfully gorgeous heels on. (Manolos to be exact)
Kate
Empire State of Mind
Looks like we all could use a quick catnap from the blog. Kate's on vacation, The Man is disturbingly quiet all of a sudden. Guess Candy wiped him out for a bit. As for me, I'm still out and about, enjoying every minute of this gorgeous summer weather. But, when two out of the three are on leave well I feel like joining the bandwagon for a few as well.
June certainly was the most memorable month to date for Love Bites. We started the month with a scandal of sorts and some entertaining soap opera drama. June also has been our busiest writing month and we've still got a few more days left.
The archives are adding up and for new readers it may seem overwhelming. At this point I'm not sure if it's wiser to start at the beginning and work you way up to the present or start in our current reality and go back in time. Either way it will be time well spent.
I spent yesterday in Soprano land (New Jersey), visiting an old childhood friend, Jen (celebrity look alike Kelly Preston) and her husband Steven (look alike Vince Vaughn). They live at the end of the cul-de-sac, all beautiful Tudor McMansions, pristine manicured lawns, a dealership of BMW's in each driveway. It is the stereotypical ideal of suburban life and they are the stereotypical ideal of perfection. Two adorable children, Eric is ten going on thirty and Molly, is eight.
We have lunch outside on the deck; caprese salad, grilled salmon with broccoli, fresh fruit and a lemon tart accompanied by a bottle of chardonnay from Steven's brother's vineyard. Jen said she made everything, but I have a feeling there was a trip to the local Whole Foods. She is a stay at home mom. Steven is a partner at a law firm in Manhattan. The kids entertained themselves with the new Wii games I bought them.
When we were little, Jen and I were BFFs. My mother use to say, we were joined at the hip. Jen's family moved to Illinois when we were thirteen. We lost touch shortly after, but thanks to the Internet we quickly have become BFFs again.
At last I said goodbye and at mock speed was on my way back home. I was afraid if I stayed any longer, I too would become part of the stereotype.
There is something beautiful and magical about driving into New York City. You are aware that this metropolitan city is moments ago, yet it always feels like I’m about to discover greatness.
The city can be overwhelming at times. The hustle and bustle, the honking on the yellow submarines, the endless amount of J walkers (myself included at times). It’s a Mecca of greatness, of wealth, of success. You can live your whole life here and never see it all. The mix of people on each block is fascinating. It has its moments of suburban life, Mister Softie and the all to familiar musical melody driving past or teenagers on their skateboards. You quickly realize that in order to survive here you must be fearless and confident. If not you will get lost in the hustle and thrown out with the trash.
SP
June certainly was the most memorable month to date for Love Bites. We started the month with a scandal of sorts and some entertaining soap opera drama. June also has been our busiest writing month and we've still got a few more days left.
The archives are adding up and for new readers it may seem overwhelming. At this point I'm not sure if it's wiser to start at the beginning and work you way up to the present or start in our current reality and go back in time. Either way it will be time well spent.
I spent yesterday in Soprano land (New Jersey), visiting an old childhood friend, Jen (celebrity look alike Kelly Preston) and her husband Steven (look alike Vince Vaughn). They live at the end of the cul-de-sac, all beautiful Tudor McMansions, pristine manicured lawns, a dealership of BMW's in each driveway. It is the stereotypical ideal of suburban life and they are the stereotypical ideal of perfection. Two adorable children, Eric is ten going on thirty and Molly, is eight.
We have lunch outside on the deck; caprese salad, grilled salmon with broccoli, fresh fruit and a lemon tart accompanied by a bottle of chardonnay from Steven's brother's vineyard. Jen said she made everything, but I have a feeling there was a trip to the local Whole Foods. She is a stay at home mom. Steven is a partner at a law firm in Manhattan. The kids entertained themselves with the new Wii games I bought them.
When we were little, Jen and I were BFFs. My mother use to say, we were joined at the hip. Jen's family moved to Illinois when we were thirteen. We lost touch shortly after, but thanks to the Internet we quickly have become BFFs again.
At last I said goodbye and at mock speed was on my way back home. I was afraid if I stayed any longer, I too would become part of the stereotype.
There is something beautiful and magical about driving into New York City. You are aware that this metropolitan city is moments ago, yet it always feels like I’m about to discover greatness.
The city can be overwhelming at times. The hustle and bustle, the honking on the yellow submarines, the endless amount of J walkers (myself included at times). It’s a Mecca of greatness, of wealth, of success. You can live your whole life here and never see it all. The mix of people on each block is fascinating. It has its moments of suburban life, Mister Softie and the all to familiar musical melody driving past or teenagers on their skateboards. You quickly realize that in order to survive here you must be fearless and confident. If not you will get lost in the hustle and thrown out with the trash.
SP
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Out of the Office Auto Reply
"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." - Mohandas K. Gandhi
I have discovered that writing is a humbling process. Not everyone will agree with what I have to say, but those that do understand are my kindred spirits. The rough draft of the book is quickly coming together. I hope to dedicate a couple days next week to writing. At the same time, I will probably be taking a quick break from writing on the blog to decompress. I'll be back before you know it.
I'm on the move again tomorrow; think I might have gone overboard on the packing. More shoes than clothes, but hey you never know what mood you might be in. I'm on a jewelry binge these days, stocking up on investment pieces. "I deserve it. I work hard." Isn't that what all women say before they buy something ridiculously expensive, but so worth the splurge.
I've found a new place to call home in a city that once was so familiar. Perhaps, this is my second chance at a life I walked away from many years ago.
There are still days when I find myself questioning the war. It never could have been real, yet it seems all to real now. I wish the ghosts would just let me be. Haven't they inflicted enough emotional damage already? I didn't start the war. I am a casualty of the ambush. The last thing I ever wanted was a fight. From the beginning all I wanted was an explanation and an apology. That's all. I wasn't asking for much. I would have peacefully walked away then. No bitterness, resentment or hatred. I'm well aware that I'm a broken record asking for something that will never come. I forgive you and I want to forget you. Ironic isn't it. Given how I'm writing a book and all, but this is how I forget people, I write about them. It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. I've already been hurt so let the party begin. Oh wait it already has and the fat lady is about to sing.
See ya in a few.
Kate
I have discovered that writing is a humbling process. Not everyone will agree with what I have to say, but those that do understand are my kindred spirits. The rough draft of the book is quickly coming together. I hope to dedicate a couple days next week to writing. At the same time, I will probably be taking a quick break from writing on the blog to decompress. I'll be back before you know it.
I'm on the move again tomorrow; think I might have gone overboard on the packing. More shoes than clothes, but hey you never know what mood you might be in. I'm on a jewelry binge these days, stocking up on investment pieces. "I deserve it. I work hard." Isn't that what all women say before they buy something ridiculously expensive, but so worth the splurge.
I've found a new place to call home in a city that once was so familiar. Perhaps, this is my second chance at a life I walked away from many years ago.
There are still days when I find myself questioning the war. It never could have been real, yet it seems all to real now. I wish the ghosts would just let me be. Haven't they inflicted enough emotional damage already? I didn't start the war. I am a casualty of the ambush. The last thing I ever wanted was a fight. From the beginning all I wanted was an explanation and an apology. That's all. I wasn't asking for much. I would have peacefully walked away then. No bitterness, resentment or hatred. I'm well aware that I'm a broken record asking for something that will never come. I forgive you and I want to forget you. Ironic isn't it. Given how I'm writing a book and all, but this is how I forget people, I write about them. It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. I've already been hurt so let the party begin. Oh wait it already has and the fat lady is about to sing.
See ya in a few.
Kate
Friday, June 25, 2010
Pretty Woman
Okay so here's a funny little story. Well, more fascinating then funny. By now you all know that we are planning a party in Miami next week. I've never been one who is paranoid, but some very odd things have been going on in the last couple weeks. Like we said from the beginning, don't judge a book by its cover. I've always believed that when you are on the clock, you leave your personal business at the door. This is strictly a business transaction, nothing more. But, I guess some places pick and choose which customers they will serve.
I am reminded of the scene in Pretty Woman, where Julia Roberts goes into the clothing store on Rodeo Drive wearing a barely there outfit and based solely on her appearance the sales associate refuses to help her. When she walks back in a few days later, all done up in designer clothes the same sales person is more than happy to help her, but it's too late. She is gone, "You work on commission right? Big mistake, huge. I have more shopping to do." This pretty much sums up the horrible customer service experience I've been having.
It is Kate's father's birthday next week and being that he along with a handful of close family and friends will be joining the festivities next week in Miami, I thought it would be fun to plan a little surprise birthday bash for him (Surprise!). In the past he had frequented this establishment and always praised the food and service. So, I figured what the hell and called to inquire about hosting a small dinner in the Lion's Den (yes, really). Then I thought why not host the Love Bites party there too, but
Kate quickly talked me out of that. If you read my post "LOL for the Inner Circle" last week maybe it makes more sense now.
Initially the coordinator seemed very professional and attentive. She emailed me sample menus and I responded with my preferences and a number of questions. I never heard back, this was almost two weeks ago. A couple days ago she left me a voicemail explaining that she had been trying to email me, but the address was bouncing back (which it isn't) and that she had tried to call me a number of times (there were no missed calls or voicemails). I immediately responded with another email from my other account, again expressing our interest and could she please confirm receipt of my email and if the space was still available could she follow up with menu pricing. This was three days ago now. I did receive a missed call from her number yesterday, but no message. So again, I emailed her and this time I got an out of office for the next week auto reply. I realized that there was a chance given my name, cell phone number (It use to be Kate's, we swapped phones.), email address and the date and time of the event that certain people might automatically assume we were trying to have a confrontation, but really grow up people.
So, now not only am I frustrated and shocked by the lack of professionalism and miserable customer service. When from the start all she had to say was, "I'm sorry Ms. Peterson, but the room is booked that night." The circle of business friends who spend the majority of their lives in airplanes and fancy hotels are so appalled that they no longer want to do business with this company. (It's an international brand) Here's the really funny part, six out of the ten people are professional writers. A couple work for national papers, one owns a handful of business magazines and the majority has all published multiple books related to business practices. The other guests are all lawyers. Perhaps an article in the HBJ or the newest yuppie magazine is in the works now - Secondhand Ex Effect Discrimination Against the AARP Generation. Oh well, guess some companies are so flush with green they don't need more business. The silver lining to this story is that JSR might be going to print before we thought. The world really does work in mysterious ways.
Big mistake, huge. I've got a party to plan and money to spend.
SP
I am reminded of the scene in Pretty Woman, where Julia Roberts goes into the clothing store on Rodeo Drive wearing a barely there outfit and based solely on her appearance the sales associate refuses to help her. When she walks back in a few days later, all done up in designer clothes the same sales person is more than happy to help her, but it's too late. She is gone, "You work on commission right? Big mistake, huge. I have more shopping to do." This pretty much sums up the horrible customer service experience I've been having.
It is Kate's father's birthday next week and being that he along with a handful of close family and friends will be joining the festivities next week in Miami, I thought it would be fun to plan a little surprise birthday bash for him (Surprise!). In the past he had frequented this establishment and always praised the food and service. So, I figured what the hell and called to inquire about hosting a small dinner in the Lion's Den (yes, really). Then I thought why not host the Love Bites party there too, but
Kate quickly talked me out of that. If you read my post "LOL for the Inner Circle" last week maybe it makes more sense now.
Initially the coordinator seemed very professional and attentive. She emailed me sample menus and I responded with my preferences and a number of questions. I never heard back, this was almost two weeks ago. A couple days ago she left me a voicemail explaining that she had been trying to email me, but the address was bouncing back (which it isn't) and that she had tried to call me a number of times (there were no missed calls or voicemails). I immediately responded with another email from my other account, again expressing our interest and could she please confirm receipt of my email and if the space was still available could she follow up with menu pricing. This was three days ago now. I did receive a missed call from her number yesterday, but no message. So again, I emailed her and this time I got an out of office for the next week auto reply. I realized that there was a chance given my name, cell phone number (It use to be Kate's, we swapped phones.), email address and the date and time of the event that certain people might automatically assume we were trying to have a confrontation, but really grow up people.
So, now not only am I frustrated and shocked by the lack of professionalism and miserable customer service. When from the start all she had to say was, "I'm sorry Ms. Peterson, but the room is booked that night." The circle of business friends who spend the majority of their lives in airplanes and fancy hotels are so appalled that they no longer want to do business with this company. (It's an international brand) Here's the really funny part, six out of the ten people are professional writers. A couple work for national papers, one owns a handful of business magazines and the majority has all published multiple books related to business practices. The other guests are all lawyers. Perhaps an article in the HBJ or the newest yuppie magazine is in the works now - Secondhand Ex Effect Discrimination Against the AARP Generation. Oh well, guess some companies are so flush with green they don't need more business. The silver lining to this story is that JSR might be going to print before we thought. The world really does work in mysterious ways.
Big mistake, huge. I've got a party to plan and money to spend.
SP
Tattooed Soul
When we started planning the original Love Bites party, I thought why just one night, why not a whole week of fabulousness. The Big Apple welcome wagon is in full swing. The first of many parties occurred tonight. Just because I can't make it to palm tree land doesn't mean I have to miss out on the fun. I've always loved parties; fabulous friends, open bar, gifts, yummy food and of course an excuse to play dress up. If I had known that the perks of hosting a get together included bottles of Veuve, J.Torres chocolates and sinfully delicious Crumbs cupcakes, I would have a party every night of the week. Oh and how could I forget the obscene bouquet of orchids and roses from Mc Dreamy. How fabulous.
It is in times of sorrow and humility that the band of brothers stands up and guards it's fallen soldiers. I am reminded of this on a daily basis now. As I no longer am a wounded victim, but a grief counselor to the newest casualty of love gone bad. The scars will never truly heal; they are a permanent reminder of the war battled in. The war of love is an endless fight. Many will try few will succeed. Physical scars will fade overtime, but the emotional bruises will forever be tattooed and branded on the soul.
I have learned so much about myself and about the strength of my band of brothers in recent months and weeks. I started my emotional journey nearly a year ago. Yet, when I look back it feels like many years have past.
I don't know the person I once was. She too is merely a figment of my imagination these days. Who I have evolved into is a strong warrior and this serendipitous new life am one I never dreamt about, yet it's as thou it was set in stone a long time ago.
Sometimes it is what is not said that says it all. Silence truly is golden. For once the words come out, questions will be asked and accusations will be made. In the battle of love, what are we fighting for and what are we defending?
It's a surreal thought being within reach and yet so far away. The future is fast approaching, yet the past is still holding a grudge.
SP
It is in times of sorrow and humility that the band of brothers stands up and guards it's fallen soldiers. I am reminded of this on a daily basis now. As I no longer am a wounded victim, but a grief counselor to the newest casualty of love gone bad. The scars will never truly heal; they are a permanent reminder of the war battled in. The war of love is an endless fight. Many will try few will succeed. Physical scars will fade overtime, but the emotional bruises will forever be tattooed and branded on the soul.
I have learned so much about myself and about the strength of my band of brothers in recent months and weeks. I started my emotional journey nearly a year ago. Yet, when I look back it feels like many years have past.
I don't know the person I once was. She too is merely a figment of my imagination these days. Who I have evolved into is a strong warrior and this serendipitous new life am one I never dreamt about, yet it's as thou it was set in stone a long time ago.
Sometimes it is what is not said that says it all. Silence truly is golden. For once the words come out, questions will be asked and accusations will be made. In the battle of love, what are we fighting for and what are we defending?
It's a surreal thought being within reach and yet so far away. The future is fast approaching, yet the past is still holding a grudge.
SP
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Candyland
Well, here goes! I was told this blog wasn't PG rated any longer, but I'm sure you had no idea what I could get myself into. Let me start off with a strong warning ***{WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ IS CRAZY AS HELL}***
I first need to let you into who I am a little...I am the "fun guy", always laughing or getting laughed at. I am not scared of much, will try about anything, can B.S. the best B.S.ers, and when needed will do or say whatever necessary to make someone feel comfortable. I haven’t really had any dating advice or PG stories that were good enough to share. This one will make some laugh; gross some out, and might turn one or two on. Sit down, (if you're eating, finish before reading) relax, hold on, & enjoy the blog!!
As we stated form the beginning we were going to be as honest as we could possibly be. I saw that someone wanted to hear the "best and worst dating stories" This is my most recent.
Sunday, June 20. As I was home bored, I decided to check some mail from my dating sites. I stumbled upon one profile that caught my attention...
About Me
CANDY: High self-confidence and loves to interact with other people. Loves to be stimulated by a strong, self-confident man who is not uptight (LOL) but has good self-control. Someone who will dig the fun, smart, quick, warm, loving, caring and yet very, very humble (and not so simple) woman that I am. Someone who will allow me to be me.
I take full responsibility for all my actions... all...
NO REGRETS
I have exceptionally high standards, so please, no games and no lies. I am here for personal reasons, so please; don't even go there with me (if you know what I mean). I have both class and style...please treat me with both. I don't lie or deceive any one in my life and would appreciate the same from you. Please don't assume anything about me, because you really don't know me. Keep an open mind concerning me and I will do the same with you.
So, if you'd still like to meet me, know that my pictures are there because I love the ones I've chosen. They're all a part of who I am. If I could only put up one photo, it would be the one of me wearing the mask! It tells you who I am: smart, confident, sexy, clever, mysterious, playful, intelligent, daring, but also...always guarded. I am watching you at all times.
I study your pictures and can profile you by that alone. I never read profiles...I don't have to...the pics, profession and your first words to me tell me all I need to get my first impression of you. So, please, don't try mess with me. I will nail you time after time. I can see you coming from miles away and I carefully plan my moves. I might jump fast with you, to show you that I care and am interested. But as soon as I sense danger or insincerity, I will jump right out faster than I jumped in. So before you enter my zone, my waters, keep in mind: this woman is a SHARK. LOL You is the prey, not me.
I am not asking you to "try" me or "test" me. All I am telling you is the same thing that Israel tells the world: "Don't mess with us". LOL
From what I have seen so far, I love men that work for the government. The ones from the "Counter-Intelligence Agency", for example. LOL I know, I will get in trouble for putting it out there, but I can't help it. I have met some of them and they are the best of the best. Some of them keep an open mind, some of them don't, but I like the interaction with that type of man. There is something about them that makes me feels alive and they definitely seem to be my type. I know it's not fair for the rest of you, I suppose, but what can I tell you, I say it as I feel it. And right now that's what I feel. Maybe tomorrow my profile will change...maybe my location will change as well. So there it is: I DARE myself...and I know what's coming from stating it, yet I put it out there anyway.
PLEASE DON'T ASK ME STUPID QUESTIONS... READ THE PROFILE... AND WHEN I SAY I AM HERE FOR PERSONAL REASONS I AM.... NOT BUSINESS.... PERSONAL... GOT THAT?
So, after reading and seeing the half naked pics, I was entertained at the idea of seeing what she was all about. We wrote back and forth with really short messages :(me) your photos are amazing! I know I’ve written you before. But I don’t like to give up too easy for things I really want.
(Her) babe, you never ever wrote to me before... I would remember
(Me) Well Hello Candy, I could have sworn I did. I hope I wasn't too forward, but I really like your pics! And I know what you mean about Govt. workers. Wink*
Do you live in Miami?
(Her) yes I do... are you a Govt. worker ... wink.... LOL
(Me) Let's just say it has been in the family for a while.
(Her) when I was in DC.... oh my GOD.... too much fun... I was in a real candy store.
(ME) What is it that excites you? The mystery? The secrecy? Or the low level of trust? It can be a challenge. Are you up for it?
(Her) wow you just nailed it.... some of each... and more then that they understood my world.... the moving all the time... living on the edge.... the do or die if you don't read the person in front of you right... the mentality of here now gone tomorrow... we just clicked... plus they super sexy and sharp.... and they surprised me.... showed me who was in charge.... oh my god I had fun there....
(ME) well it's your move, I am free tonight. Call me
At that very moment my phone rings, Discussions were held, and the time and place were set in motion. Hahahhahahahhaha, I am a secret agent!!
I arrived in the hidden location on Miami Beach. It was a home once lived in by Frank Sinatra that was converted to a hotel. As she walked to meet me at the entrance, I noticed a dark haired attractive woman wearing stiletto heels, a short dress, very revealing shirt and some sort or a silk wrap covering her. We greeted each other with a kiss and headed towards her room. (Amazing place) We proceeded to go out on the balcony, open a bottle of wine and share stories. The wine was flowing, stories were getting better, and the BUZZ was on.
So I mentioned before that if you knew me, I joke and can tell great stories. Here goes one of my best! As the stories were getting heated, she then told me she was a dominatrix! WOW!!! Holy crap! I need to keep it together and pretend like it doesn’t bother me. She then begins telling stories about high-ranking Govt. officials, fantasies and bestiality. WHOA!!! Really???? Yes!!! She then told me about how she always loved as a child the memories of milking the cows...So here's where my crazy plan
Began...
She asked, " Have you ever thought of being with an animal"? I did all I could do but to laugh as I said " well, actually...as I began masturbating, I once used peanut butter on my D**K as my dog licked it" She was sooooooo turned on at that point that she told me to open my shirt, unzip my pants and begin to masturbate. I knew her job was to tell people what to do all the time so I said " NO!!! You get your ass over here, on your knees, unzip me (with your mouth) and only then will I allow you to masturbate while watching me!!" she was shocked! But also as aroused as possible. I then did something I will laugh at for many years to come. I told her to remain on all fours, come towards me, moo like a cow...as I milk you! Ahhahahahhahahaahahhahaa...And guess what happened???????? MOOOOOOO!! MOOOOOOO!!! MOOOOOO!!!! And the milking began!! I sometimes just amaze myself. And this was one story too hard to hold in. There were so many more details to this 6 hr. experience, but I am tired of typing for tonight.
The Man
I first need to let you into who I am a little...I am the "fun guy", always laughing or getting laughed at. I am not scared of much, will try about anything, can B.S. the best B.S.ers, and when needed will do or say whatever necessary to make someone feel comfortable. I haven’t really had any dating advice or PG stories that were good enough to share. This one will make some laugh; gross some out, and might turn one or two on. Sit down, (if you're eating, finish before reading) relax, hold on, & enjoy the blog!!
As we stated form the beginning we were going to be as honest as we could possibly be. I saw that someone wanted to hear the "best and worst dating stories" This is my most recent.
Sunday, June 20. As I was home bored, I decided to check some mail from my dating sites. I stumbled upon one profile that caught my attention...
About Me
CANDY: High self-confidence and loves to interact with other people. Loves to be stimulated by a strong, self-confident man who is not uptight (LOL) but has good self-control. Someone who will dig the fun, smart, quick, warm, loving, caring and yet very, very humble (and not so simple) woman that I am. Someone who will allow me to be me.
I take full responsibility for all my actions... all...
NO REGRETS
I have exceptionally high standards, so please, no games and no lies. I am here for personal reasons, so please; don't even go there with me (if you know what I mean). I have both class and style...please treat me with both. I don't lie or deceive any one in my life and would appreciate the same from you. Please don't assume anything about me, because you really don't know me. Keep an open mind concerning me and I will do the same with you.
So, if you'd still like to meet me, know that my pictures are there because I love the ones I've chosen. They're all a part of who I am. If I could only put up one photo, it would be the one of me wearing the mask! It tells you who I am: smart, confident, sexy, clever, mysterious, playful, intelligent, daring, but also...always guarded. I am watching you at all times.
I study your pictures and can profile you by that alone. I never read profiles...I don't have to...the pics, profession and your first words to me tell me all I need to get my first impression of you. So, please, don't try mess with me. I will nail you time after time. I can see you coming from miles away and I carefully plan my moves. I might jump fast with you, to show you that I care and am interested. But as soon as I sense danger or insincerity, I will jump right out faster than I jumped in. So before you enter my zone, my waters, keep in mind: this woman is a SHARK. LOL You is the prey, not me.
I am not asking you to "try" me or "test" me. All I am telling you is the same thing that Israel tells the world: "Don't mess with us". LOL
From what I have seen so far, I love men that work for the government. The ones from the "Counter-Intelligence Agency", for example. LOL I know, I will get in trouble for putting it out there, but I can't help it. I have met some of them and they are the best of the best. Some of them keep an open mind, some of them don't, but I like the interaction with that type of man. There is something about them that makes me feels alive and they definitely seem to be my type. I know it's not fair for the rest of you, I suppose, but what can I tell you, I say it as I feel it. And right now that's what I feel. Maybe tomorrow my profile will change...maybe my location will change as well. So there it is: I DARE myself...and I know what's coming from stating it, yet I put it out there anyway.
PLEASE DON'T ASK ME STUPID QUESTIONS... READ THE PROFILE... AND WHEN I SAY I AM HERE FOR PERSONAL REASONS I AM.... NOT BUSINESS.... PERSONAL... GOT THAT?
So, after reading and seeing the half naked pics, I was entertained at the idea of seeing what she was all about. We wrote back and forth with really short messages :(me) your photos are amazing! I know I’ve written you before. But I don’t like to give up too easy for things I really want.
(Her) babe, you never ever wrote to me before... I would remember
(Me) Well Hello Candy, I could have sworn I did. I hope I wasn't too forward, but I really like your pics! And I know what you mean about Govt. workers. Wink*
Do you live in Miami?
(Her) yes I do... are you a Govt. worker ... wink.... LOL
(Me) Let's just say it has been in the family for a while.
(Her) when I was in DC.... oh my GOD.... too much fun... I was in a real candy store.
(ME) What is it that excites you? The mystery? The secrecy? Or the low level of trust? It can be a challenge. Are you up for it?
(Her) wow you just nailed it.... some of each... and more then that they understood my world.... the moving all the time... living on the edge.... the do or die if you don't read the person in front of you right... the mentality of here now gone tomorrow... we just clicked... plus they super sexy and sharp.... and they surprised me.... showed me who was in charge.... oh my god I had fun there....
(ME) well it's your move, I am free tonight. Call me
At that very moment my phone rings, Discussions were held, and the time and place were set in motion. Hahahhahahahhaha, I am a secret agent!!
I arrived in the hidden location on Miami Beach. It was a home once lived in by Frank Sinatra that was converted to a hotel. As she walked to meet me at the entrance, I noticed a dark haired attractive woman wearing stiletto heels, a short dress, very revealing shirt and some sort or a silk wrap covering her. We greeted each other with a kiss and headed towards her room. (Amazing place) We proceeded to go out on the balcony, open a bottle of wine and share stories. The wine was flowing, stories were getting better, and the BUZZ was on.
So I mentioned before that if you knew me, I joke and can tell great stories. Here goes one of my best! As the stories were getting heated, she then told me she was a dominatrix! WOW!!! Holy crap! I need to keep it together and pretend like it doesn’t bother me. She then begins telling stories about high-ranking Govt. officials, fantasies and bestiality. WHOA!!! Really???? Yes!!! She then told me about how she always loved as a child the memories of milking the cows...So here's where my crazy plan
Began...
She asked, " Have you ever thought of being with an animal"? I did all I could do but to laugh as I said " well, actually...as I began masturbating, I once used peanut butter on my D**K as my dog licked it" She was sooooooo turned on at that point that she told me to open my shirt, unzip my pants and begin to masturbate. I knew her job was to tell people what to do all the time so I said " NO!!! You get your ass over here, on your knees, unzip me (with your mouth) and only then will I allow you to masturbate while watching me!!" she was shocked! But also as aroused as possible. I then did something I will laugh at for many years to come. I told her to remain on all fours, come towards me, moo like a cow...as I milk you! Ahhahahahhahahaahahhahaa...And guess what happened???????? MOOOOOOO!! MOOOOOOO!!! MOOOOOO!!!! And the milking began!! I sometimes just amaze myself. And this was one story too hard to hold in. There were so many more details to this 6 hr. experience, but I am tired of typing for tonight.
The Man
Fun Girl Tell All
“Some choices we live not only once but a thousand times over, remembering them for the rest of our lives.” - Richard Bach
We aren't the first nor will we be the last to take to the Internet and display all the dirty laundry about an ex. Most people sit at home with a pint or two of ice cream, some pizza and watch a marathon of sappy chick flicks. Then go the gym and attempt to loss the fifteen pounds they gained during the heartbreak depression. We took a different approach, that didn't include food binges, but did include a few romantic movies.
Ultimately what defines who you are as a person is how you act when faced with an emotional bulldozer. Some sit back and hope that the pain will go away with time, they don't question the masochist because they still fear him, they find someone else to care for them and they pretend all is well with the world again. Then there are the daredevils, the underdogs, that instead of letting it go and walking away with their head down, take their pain a few steps further and kick some ass. Isn't the definition of a fun girl someone who takes risks, who is a daredevil not just in bed, but also in life? Fun girls have a lifetime guarantee and until you burn them they will keep your dirty secrets locked. But, be warned we don't play fair, but then you should know that already, wasn't that the allure to begin with?
The fun girl always seems to know all the juicy, forbidden secrets. All the quirks, fantasies, desire that the Plain Jane wife may never know. There is something to be said for being the keeper of these naughty thoughts. I've got nothing to lose here and whether you believe what I might disclose is up to you, but I'm sure it will get you thinking about how well do you really know your spouse.
We can live our whole life with someone and never really know them. Everyone has secrets or little white lies and yes every guy (regardless of if they are married) still watches porn. Really what's so bad about that? You can't honestly expect sleeping with the same person for the next thirty or forty years isn't going to get boring.
There is a perfect storm brewing, yet I'm in a permanent meditative bliss. I'm reminded of the scene in Office Space where Peter is sleeping and the phone keeps ringing and he's oblivious to the worlds wants.
Due to recent life altering revelations, I've been wondering why it is that I willingly allowed masochists into my life. Was it because of my youth? If I knew from the start that something was off, why did I continue to return for more pain? In relationships have I been chasing the rush just as I obsess over the newest Mulberry bag? But, once the thrill of the chase is gone the reality of the forbidden fruit is all too relevant.
When faced with an emotional uphill battle why do we cling to false hope? To a past that never existed and put a heavy weight on someone who thrives off of pain and power mind games.
Who was I then? Why did I think it was normal and furthermore why did I continue to let the masochist control my thoughts? Was there ever a time when it was real? When it wasn't all smoke and mirrors? I ask these questions and I suppose I hold on to this example of an s-m relationship because it's not the norm for me. Sure a part of me got off on the thrill and flirt hunt. The encoded conversations, the forbidden fruit. But, was it nothing more than a past time. Something to do while waiting for the next best object of my affection to walk by.
What is it about getting married that all of a sudden makes you a jealous psycho? Do we as a society fear growing old alone so much that we claim ownership of whoever expresses interest in us and yet by doing this we lose our self-confidence and become jealous psychos? To the point that we religiously check our spouse’s emails, calls, credit card bills, because we fear someone better might come along and then the fairytale dream will shatter? Yet by doing these things and acting more like a second mother than a lover we are in reality driving them to find comfort with a "fun girl or boy."
In recent days, I am reminded that M and company are not my friends, never were I suppose. It's a surreal feeling at times. When I think back to a life once lived I tend to forget this major fact. There will always be pieces of my past in the present and future. Which are a blessing and a curse, knowing that I can never ever truly be free from the masochists. I wonder if I am the masochist now, by continue to throw fuel into the fire. The past will never truly die, but then maybe it never was meant to.
Kate
We aren't the first nor will we be the last to take to the Internet and display all the dirty laundry about an ex. Most people sit at home with a pint or two of ice cream, some pizza and watch a marathon of sappy chick flicks. Then go the gym and attempt to loss the fifteen pounds they gained during the heartbreak depression. We took a different approach, that didn't include food binges, but did include a few romantic movies.
Ultimately what defines who you are as a person is how you act when faced with an emotional bulldozer. Some sit back and hope that the pain will go away with time, they don't question the masochist because they still fear him, they find someone else to care for them and they pretend all is well with the world again. Then there are the daredevils, the underdogs, that instead of letting it go and walking away with their head down, take their pain a few steps further and kick some ass. Isn't the definition of a fun girl someone who takes risks, who is a daredevil not just in bed, but also in life? Fun girls have a lifetime guarantee and until you burn them they will keep your dirty secrets locked. But, be warned we don't play fair, but then you should know that already, wasn't that the allure to begin with?
The fun girl always seems to know all the juicy, forbidden secrets. All the quirks, fantasies, desire that the Plain Jane wife may never know. There is something to be said for being the keeper of these naughty thoughts. I've got nothing to lose here and whether you believe what I might disclose is up to you, but I'm sure it will get you thinking about how well do you really know your spouse.
We can live our whole life with someone and never really know them. Everyone has secrets or little white lies and yes every guy (regardless of if they are married) still watches porn. Really what's so bad about that? You can't honestly expect sleeping with the same person for the next thirty or forty years isn't going to get boring.
There is a perfect storm brewing, yet I'm in a permanent meditative bliss. I'm reminded of the scene in Office Space where Peter is sleeping and the phone keeps ringing and he's oblivious to the worlds wants.
Due to recent life altering revelations, I've been wondering why it is that I willingly allowed masochists into my life. Was it because of my youth? If I knew from the start that something was off, why did I continue to return for more pain? In relationships have I been chasing the rush just as I obsess over the newest Mulberry bag? But, once the thrill of the chase is gone the reality of the forbidden fruit is all too relevant.
When faced with an emotional uphill battle why do we cling to false hope? To a past that never existed and put a heavy weight on someone who thrives off of pain and power mind games.
Who was I then? Why did I think it was normal and furthermore why did I continue to let the masochist control my thoughts? Was there ever a time when it was real? When it wasn't all smoke and mirrors? I ask these questions and I suppose I hold on to this example of an s-m relationship because it's not the norm for me. Sure a part of me got off on the thrill and flirt hunt. The encoded conversations, the forbidden fruit. But, was it nothing more than a past time. Something to do while waiting for the next best object of my affection to walk by.
What is it about getting married that all of a sudden makes you a jealous psycho? Do we as a society fear growing old alone so much that we claim ownership of whoever expresses interest in us and yet by doing this we lose our self-confidence and become jealous psychos? To the point that we religiously check our spouse’s emails, calls, credit card bills, because we fear someone better might come along and then the fairytale dream will shatter? Yet by doing these things and acting more like a second mother than a lover we are in reality driving them to find comfort with a "fun girl or boy."
In recent days, I am reminded that M and company are not my friends, never were I suppose. It's a surreal feeling at times. When I think back to a life once lived I tend to forget this major fact. There will always be pieces of my past in the present and future. Which are a blessing and a curse, knowing that I can never ever truly be free from the masochists. I wonder if I am the masochist now, by continue to throw fuel into the fire. The past will never truly die, but then maybe it never was meant to.
Kate
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Adventures with Sonoma Gal
"People who treat other people as less than human must not be surprised when the bread they have cast on the waters comes floating back to them, poisoned." ~ James Baldwin
The moment you let go of the pain, the worrying and wondering of the unknown, is when you get sucker punched again. But, this time you don't fall to the ground or run away, you fight back.
Another JSR has been added to the dartboard and Love Bites hall of shame and I'm hoping V (aka Sonoma gal) is going to follow our serendipitous writing vibe and become the fourth writer. Let's see what The Man has to say about this one. Not that he really gets a vote. (Sorry, ladies first)
Crossing my fingers and clicking my sparkly gold Jimmy Choos that Sonoma gal will finally get her butt to the sunshine state. It would be the best belated birthday present ever. You don't really have a choice, J is going to ambush you at the vineyard and be your chaperone. :) You must come V, what fun is a party without you.
I was trying to remember the last time I saw you and could it really be almost seven years ago. My first and last game of beer pong, in the back of a sports bar somewhere in New York City. I was living in Florida at the time and I flew up for a long weekend. You were working at that exquisite new "it" place. Yet, it feels like you have been right by my side all these years. Listening to me bitch about M and giving me words of wisdom.
I've had some of my best memories with you. The day you turned twenty-one and bought four bottles of wine and we then processed to drink three of the four bottles that night and twenty four hours later I was still drunk. Which was rather amusing since I then had my job interview at the fs the next morning and as we were driving into the city I hit the car in front of me in the bumper to bumper traffic. Thankfully with no damage, at least not that time, there would be many more attempts to destroy that car in the years to come; by like me it was stubborn. After which, we went for dinner at No 9 and being that you were legal and all we drank some more. I can't remember where we slept that night.
Or there was the trip for the follow up interview (I got the job anyways) that resulted in us getting lost for three hours trying to find Blue Ginger. Another classic moment from the adventures of Sonoma gal and Kate.
The most memorable of note thou is the insanely hilarious email thread between you and J. Waking up and checking my mail to see over a dozen back and forth comments between you two insomniacs about everything and anything. How a conversation that started about bacon and fois gras ended with a discussion about how many pillows do you have on your bed. Good times. Just as wise and patience with advice on M and at the same time brutally honest enough for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
With Love,
Kate
The moment you let go of the pain, the worrying and wondering of the unknown, is when you get sucker punched again. But, this time you don't fall to the ground or run away, you fight back.
Another JSR has been added to the dartboard and Love Bites hall of shame and I'm hoping V (aka Sonoma gal) is going to follow our serendipitous writing vibe and become the fourth writer. Let's see what The Man has to say about this one. Not that he really gets a vote. (Sorry, ladies first)
Crossing my fingers and clicking my sparkly gold Jimmy Choos that Sonoma gal will finally get her butt to the sunshine state. It would be the best belated birthday present ever. You don't really have a choice, J is going to ambush you at the vineyard and be your chaperone. :) You must come V, what fun is a party without you.
I was trying to remember the last time I saw you and could it really be almost seven years ago. My first and last game of beer pong, in the back of a sports bar somewhere in New York City. I was living in Florida at the time and I flew up for a long weekend. You were working at that exquisite new "it" place. Yet, it feels like you have been right by my side all these years. Listening to me bitch about M and giving me words of wisdom.
I've had some of my best memories with you. The day you turned twenty-one and bought four bottles of wine and we then processed to drink three of the four bottles that night and twenty four hours later I was still drunk. Which was rather amusing since I then had my job interview at the fs the next morning and as we were driving into the city I hit the car in front of me in the bumper to bumper traffic. Thankfully with no damage, at least not that time, there would be many more attempts to destroy that car in the years to come; by like me it was stubborn. After which, we went for dinner at No 9 and being that you were legal and all we drank some more. I can't remember where we slept that night.
Or there was the trip for the follow up interview (I got the job anyways) that resulted in us getting lost for three hours trying to find Blue Ginger. Another classic moment from the adventures of Sonoma gal and Kate.
The most memorable of note thou is the insanely hilarious email thread between you and J. Waking up and checking my mail to see over a dozen back and forth comments between you two insomniacs about everything and anything. How a conversation that started about bacon and fois gras ended with a discussion about how many pillows do you have on your bed. Good times. Just as wise and patience with advice on M and at the same time brutally honest enough for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
With Love,
Kate
Life Altered - The Butterfly Effect
It is on days like today that I am reminded why this blog was started in the first place. We have detoured from the initial pain and in recent months and weeks have discovered sublime happiness. Just as my life is returning too normal I'm watching others alter. Today's blog is dedicated to V, our Sonoma gal; celebrity look alike would be America Ferrera. Who woke up Saturday morning unaware that by the end of the day she would be on a jet plane bound for an unknown new life. In an instant everything you cherish can alter, the people and places you once loved and found comfort in are forever tainted. Our thoughts are with you love, let the journey to sublime happiness and new beginnings start now.
The best stories sometimes are the ones left unsolved. The cliffhanger ending is intriguing and with age the mystery becomes sexier than the reality ever was.
Love doesn't always end with a white picket fence and a lifetime of memories. In the Hallmark ending to this story, there is no cheesy long, lost lovers embrace reunion. I imagine one day, many years from now, they run into one another again. A brief smile and then they remember they "hate" each other. Yet, even after all the hurt, anger and resentment they act as if the past never happened, as if they truly are happy to see one another. That would be the ending. They might exchange numbers and say something like, "It was great seeing you. Let's do lunch one day," but they never will. There still is love, masked by pain, always will be. Yet, in that brief meeting all the years of wondering are washed away and they both walk away happier. What they once were is a mystery and as it would appear the mystery will live on forever.
What a difference a few weeks can make. The theme this month seems to be about changes, new car, new wardrobe, new home, new boyfriend (still getting use to that title), new friends and new enemies.
Tragically it seems that once one life is back on track, another's is destroyed or ending. I wonder what people are thinking about when death is upon them. Do they look back on their lives and relish the memories of monumental events like births, graduations, and weddings or do they look back wishing they had done things differently. What will define you in death?
Some people are moving forward to a sublime happiness and others are moving into a dark hole that will take a lifetime to get out of. But, if what defines who we become is the result of enduring obstacles then perhaps it is the people who have a rougher ride that in the end will have accomplished more and lived a better life.
Whatever you hold in your mind will tend to occur in your life. If you continue to believe as you have always believed, you will continue to act as you have always acted. If you continue to act as you have always acted, you will continue to get what you have always gotten. If you want different results in your life or your work, all you have to do is change your mind.
Today is the turning point; remember that you are the captain of your destiny. Never relinquish control, always plot your own course.
SP
The best stories sometimes are the ones left unsolved. The cliffhanger ending is intriguing and with age the mystery becomes sexier than the reality ever was.
Love doesn't always end with a white picket fence and a lifetime of memories. In the Hallmark ending to this story, there is no cheesy long, lost lovers embrace reunion. I imagine one day, many years from now, they run into one another again. A brief smile and then they remember they "hate" each other. Yet, even after all the hurt, anger and resentment they act as if the past never happened, as if they truly are happy to see one another. That would be the ending. They might exchange numbers and say something like, "It was great seeing you. Let's do lunch one day," but they never will. There still is love, masked by pain, always will be. Yet, in that brief meeting all the years of wondering are washed away and they both walk away happier. What they once were is a mystery and as it would appear the mystery will live on forever.
What a difference a few weeks can make. The theme this month seems to be about changes, new car, new wardrobe, new home, new boyfriend (still getting use to that title), new friends and new enemies.
Tragically it seems that once one life is back on track, another's is destroyed or ending. I wonder what people are thinking about when death is upon them. Do they look back on their lives and relish the memories of monumental events like births, graduations, and weddings or do they look back wishing they had done things differently. What will define you in death?
Some people are moving forward to a sublime happiness and others are moving into a dark hole that will take a lifetime to get out of. But, if what defines who we become is the result of enduring obstacles then perhaps it is the people who have a rougher ride that in the end will have accomplished more and lived a better life.
Whatever you hold in your mind will tend to occur in your life. If you continue to believe as you have always believed, you will continue to act as you have always acted. If you continue to act as you have always acted, you will continue to get what you have always gotten. If you want different results in your life or your work, all you have to do is change your mind.
Today is the turning point; remember that you are the captain of your destiny. Never relinquish control, always plot your own course.
SP
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Casting Call
This is good. This is really good. Almost better than the time I had drinks with Queen Latifah, or met Bill Gates or sat next to Stephen King on the way back from Barcelona.
For the majority of you reading this blog we are just names on a screen. Unless we post a picture of ourselves you have no reference point. Thru our stories you may have subconsciously drawn up an image of what you think we look like and act like on the street.
When I read a story I always find it helps to have a visual aid. It makes the words on the page seem more meaningful and real. I invest my time in the characters and I find myself rooting for them or cursing their names. We could go into great descriptive detail as to the physical characteristics of all the "cast members" of the Love Bites saga, but I thought it would be easier if we just did a celebrity look alike show and tell.
Ladies
Kate - Kate Bosworth or Kristen Dunst
Me - Lindsay Price (as Victory Ford in Lipstick Jungle) or Eva Mendes
Mrs. JSR - Rosie Perez with a dash of JLo
D - Roseanne
Men
The Man - Ryan Phillippe with a dash of Tom Cruise and Bruce Willis
M (JSR) - Bradley Cooper
Mc Dreamy - Matt Damon
John - Christian Bale (in Batman not The Machinist)
Andy - Ed Burns
J - Blair Underwood
Think that covers all the current "cast members." Boy, we sure are an attractive mix. Hope this is a helpful and educational reference guide.
SP
For the majority of you reading this blog we are just names on a screen. Unless we post a picture of ourselves you have no reference point. Thru our stories you may have subconsciously drawn up an image of what you think we look like and act like on the street.
When I read a story I always find it helps to have a visual aid. It makes the words on the page seem more meaningful and real. I invest my time in the characters and I find myself rooting for them or cursing their names. We could go into great descriptive detail as to the physical characteristics of all the "cast members" of the Love Bites saga, but I thought it would be easier if we just did a celebrity look alike show and tell.
Ladies
Kate - Kate Bosworth or Kristen Dunst
Me - Lindsay Price (as Victory Ford in Lipstick Jungle) or Eva Mendes
Mrs. JSR - Rosie Perez with a dash of JLo
D - Roseanne
Men
The Man - Ryan Phillippe with a dash of Tom Cruise and Bruce Willis
M (JSR) - Bradley Cooper
Mc Dreamy - Matt Damon
John - Christian Bale (in Batman not The Machinist)
Andy - Ed Burns
J - Blair Underwood
Think that covers all the current "cast members." Boy, we sure are an attractive mix. Hope this is a helpful and educational reference guide.
SP
Welcome To The Circus
Do I feel bad? Sure a part of me feels sorry for the innocent bystanders watching this story unfold and revealing a Jekyll side to a person they consider a sweet, family man. Perhaps, to some he still is and perhaps it really is true that everyone has perfected the poker face and has learned to play a different role depending who is in their company.
I had spent months going over the last weeks and days before the note. I had told anyone and everyone the story and after a while I was starting to think I was going nuts. Why couldn't I let it go? What was it about M, about the note, about all of it that still bothered me? I needed a third party to tell me I wasn't crazy. So, I went to the place where there were nuts, a therapist. Sometimes when I would be sitting in the waiting room, there would be a person talking to themselves and cursing out strangers, but for the most part it was angry or depressed teenagers who were being forced to see a doctor. It was during those first visits in the bitter cold New England winter that the truth of years of wondering became clear. I had let myself get emotional involved with someone who was emotionless. Had it started now, I doubt I would have let all the red flags go by without a thought. So if my souvenir from visiting the circus is the ability to check one more goal off the bucket list then I am walking away a winner.
During my therapy session a few weeks ago, where we were discussing all the back and forth conversations with the supposed JSR and company, she said something rather poignant and while I had known it all along I needed to hear it from someone who wasn't bias. That was how I came to see a therapist in the first place.
Doc "From what I gather their relationship (JSR and company) is a dysfunctional one, a fight for power in a circus. You have spend months questioning yourself, wondering what you did to cause the cliffhanger and now after hearing their bizarre reasoning do you finally get it? It could never have been your fault. You did nothing wrong. They have made up their own version of the story because the truth is too painful and embarrassing to admit. No one is perfect, but the majority of the time it is the ones who portray perfection to the public that in reality, behind closed doors are so far from it. I'm an old fart when it comes to social networks, but displaying photos of your children for anyone and everyone to view and doing PDAs via the Internet is odd. They are attempting to defecate your character, in hopes of damaging the truth. Does it really matter thou? You know the truth, but they aren't sitting here, you are. So, where do you go from here?"
Me "I walk away with my dignity and pride and I continue writing. It is the best gift I could have gotten from M."
Kate
I had spent months going over the last weeks and days before the note. I had told anyone and everyone the story and after a while I was starting to think I was going nuts. Why couldn't I let it go? What was it about M, about the note, about all of it that still bothered me? I needed a third party to tell me I wasn't crazy. So, I went to the place where there were nuts, a therapist. Sometimes when I would be sitting in the waiting room, there would be a person talking to themselves and cursing out strangers, but for the most part it was angry or depressed teenagers who were being forced to see a doctor. It was during those first visits in the bitter cold New England winter that the truth of years of wondering became clear. I had let myself get emotional involved with someone who was emotionless. Had it started now, I doubt I would have let all the red flags go by without a thought. So if my souvenir from visiting the circus is the ability to check one more goal off the bucket list then I am walking away a winner.
During my therapy session a few weeks ago, where we were discussing all the back and forth conversations with the supposed JSR and company, she said something rather poignant and while I had known it all along I needed to hear it from someone who wasn't bias. That was how I came to see a therapist in the first place.
Doc "From what I gather their relationship (JSR and company) is a dysfunctional one, a fight for power in a circus. You have spend months questioning yourself, wondering what you did to cause the cliffhanger and now after hearing their bizarre reasoning do you finally get it? It could never have been your fault. You did nothing wrong. They have made up their own version of the story because the truth is too painful and embarrassing to admit. No one is perfect, but the majority of the time it is the ones who portray perfection to the public that in reality, behind closed doors are so far from it. I'm an old fart when it comes to social networks, but displaying photos of your children for anyone and everyone to view and doing PDAs via the Internet is odd. They are attempting to defecate your character, in hopes of damaging the truth. Does it really matter thou? You know the truth, but they aren't sitting here, you are. So, where do you go from here?"
Me "I walk away with my dignity and pride and I continue writing. It is the best gift I could have gotten from M."
Kate
Ludacris Fairytales
Another weekend almost over and the loneliness continue. I have been putting a lot of thought into my life, goals, and what things I haven't accomplished.
My life has always been somewhat easy in comparison to most. I work three days a week, most of the toys I've ever wanted and the most amazing jaw-dropping women around. There is just something to be said about happiness, many think you can have whatever you want with money. This is true to a point. It all depends on what type of happiness you are looking for. As the years went by, friends got married, they called less, and I noticed their "fun time" was limited. I often think about if I made the correct choices in life. There is no going back now, but did I become someone who will never be satisfied? When you are gifted with just about everything you wanted, it's tough to just be satisfied with one.
On days like today for example (HAPPY FATHERS DAY) I often think, if by now, I should have had a kid like all my friends. It just seems I am stuck in a different level than almost everyone I know, most were married young, had failed marriages and a child or two.
Many women dream of that special day where they marry the man of there dreams and lives happier after. Here is a little something a friend wrote me.
Ok, just to refresh y'alls memory!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill went tumbling after. Another fairytale, we all listened to as little girls. So as we got older we listened to songs like "Stand By Your Man" (Tammy Wynette). Etc. you get the point....
Metaphors for what ever your man does or is we should just hang in there and love them no matter what. Since we were little we have heard them all.
There is the Frog Prince that tells us that even a toad can turn into a prince if we love him enough and just by kissing him he will turn into a prince. Ha Ha... but we believed it and tried it. You know you have so don't even play with me girls....
My favorite is Cinderella of course, if a man doesn't notice you, just for who you are then make yourself up, put on the lingerie and speak to his male. Try pulling your hair back, leaving the makeup off and wearing sweats and seeing how fast you turn him on. As little girls this tells us that being ourselves isn't good enough we have to be the same as every other woman to turn his head. Both of them. Ha.... How many times have you done this girl? Don't lie you tried it too. You changed yourself in one way or another for a man...
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs... This one is to teach us that surely if she could handle seven men and their different personalities, then surely as women we could handle one man and his seven different personalities.... i.e.: grumpy, dopey, sleepy.... etc. c'mon girls you know it is true....
Old Mother Hubbard, not once does this one mention... Where the hell is the man that made all those kids with her. Hmmmm ever thought about why there is no mention of him.... He is probably sitting at the corner bar hitting on Barbie...and we won't even go into her issues ladies....
I decided I am going to be like Dorothy in the Wizard Of Oz.... Through out the whole movie all she wants to do is go home and get away from the man with no brain, the man with no heart, and the man with no courage... Damn she learned at a young age what she didn't want in a man... we all need to take a lesson from her.... I for one will stop buying into bullshit from men and only listen to the truth of their heart....
No I am not upset with men I just had a conversation with a friend and decided that I am ending my affair with fairytales and only listening to truth from now on...
So with that being said, here's my side...Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said:” NO!" And the guy lived happily ever-after and went fishing, drank beers, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell he wanted, never argued, didn't get fat, traveled more, had many lovers, saved money, and had all the hot water to himself. He went wherever he wanted, had high self-esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked great and was pleasant all the time. Most of you have already been married, had that perfect wedding, your first child, perhaps your first home and so many firsts. What am I left with? A wedding I need to pay for, kids I need to raise, and not too many first's left! I thought by having my old school beliefs would be an advantage...But the reality is maybe I will never find someone without children, never married, and is not too scared to give me their everything. The truth is we have all been hurt one way or another. I just wish you did not judge me as if I was the same as every other guy! Did I dream of that "happier ever after"? Not really, but what I am left with makes me feel somewhat cheated. I now get: every other weekend, can't stay over (because of their kids), limited time, anger issues with the ex, scared to be hurt, and the wonderful list goes on and on.
It really doesn’t matter to me if someone has kids or not, I have dated many with them. I just wish I could have the time he (the ex before kids) had to "get to know" you. So many changes after kids. If you have kids, do you remember that time period where you just met someone, had fun with no worries of thinking of a babysitter? I just wish women realized what it takes to be a single guy who really wants to get to know you, but the "getting to know you" is limited to every other weekend. Geez and you wonder why I have gone on multiple dates? Maybe cuz I only see you every other weekend! I would also want to protect my child and not allow him/her to get attached to someone right away, but be fair!! You did it before for someone else...give me that too! Sorry if I sound a little bitter, but the dating life of someone such as myself, with not too many obligations, is a simple life.
The Man
My life has always been somewhat easy in comparison to most. I work three days a week, most of the toys I've ever wanted and the most amazing jaw-dropping women around. There is just something to be said about happiness, many think you can have whatever you want with money. This is true to a point. It all depends on what type of happiness you are looking for. As the years went by, friends got married, they called less, and I noticed their "fun time" was limited. I often think about if I made the correct choices in life. There is no going back now, but did I become someone who will never be satisfied? When you are gifted with just about everything you wanted, it's tough to just be satisfied with one.
On days like today for example (HAPPY FATHERS DAY) I often think, if by now, I should have had a kid like all my friends. It just seems I am stuck in a different level than almost everyone I know, most were married young, had failed marriages and a child or two.
Many women dream of that special day where they marry the man of there dreams and lives happier after. Here is a little something a friend wrote me.
Ok, just to refresh y'alls memory!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill went tumbling after. Another fairytale, we all listened to as little girls. So as we got older we listened to songs like "Stand By Your Man" (Tammy Wynette). Etc. you get the point....
Metaphors for what ever your man does or is we should just hang in there and love them no matter what. Since we were little we have heard them all.
There is the Frog Prince that tells us that even a toad can turn into a prince if we love him enough and just by kissing him he will turn into a prince. Ha Ha... but we believed it and tried it. You know you have so don't even play with me girls....
My favorite is Cinderella of course, if a man doesn't notice you, just for who you are then make yourself up, put on the lingerie and speak to his male. Try pulling your hair back, leaving the makeup off and wearing sweats and seeing how fast you turn him on. As little girls this tells us that being ourselves isn't good enough we have to be the same as every other woman to turn his head. Both of them. Ha.... How many times have you done this girl? Don't lie you tried it too. You changed yourself in one way or another for a man...
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs... This one is to teach us that surely if she could handle seven men and their different personalities, then surely as women we could handle one man and his seven different personalities.... i.e.: grumpy, dopey, sleepy.... etc. c'mon girls you know it is true....
Old Mother Hubbard, not once does this one mention... Where the hell is the man that made all those kids with her. Hmmmm ever thought about why there is no mention of him.... He is probably sitting at the corner bar hitting on Barbie...and we won't even go into her issues ladies....
I decided I am going to be like Dorothy in the Wizard Of Oz.... Through out the whole movie all she wants to do is go home and get away from the man with no brain, the man with no heart, and the man with no courage... Damn she learned at a young age what she didn't want in a man... we all need to take a lesson from her.... I for one will stop buying into bullshit from men and only listen to the truth of their heart....
No I am not upset with men I just had a conversation with a friend and decided that I am ending my affair with fairytales and only listening to truth from now on...
So with that being said, here's my side...Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said:” NO!" And the guy lived happily ever-after and went fishing, drank beers, always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell he wanted, never argued, didn't get fat, traveled more, had many lovers, saved money, and had all the hot water to himself. He went wherever he wanted, had high self-esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked great and was pleasant all the time. Most of you have already been married, had that perfect wedding, your first child, perhaps your first home and so many firsts. What am I left with? A wedding I need to pay for, kids I need to raise, and not too many first's left! I thought by having my old school beliefs would be an advantage...But the reality is maybe I will never find someone without children, never married, and is not too scared to give me their everything. The truth is we have all been hurt one way or another. I just wish you did not judge me as if I was the same as every other guy! Did I dream of that "happier ever after"? Not really, but what I am left with makes me feel somewhat cheated. I now get: every other weekend, can't stay over (because of their kids), limited time, anger issues with the ex, scared to be hurt, and the wonderful list goes on and on.
It really doesn’t matter to me if someone has kids or not, I have dated many with them. I just wish I could have the time he (the ex before kids) had to "get to know" you. So many changes after kids. If you have kids, do you remember that time period where you just met someone, had fun with no worries of thinking of a babysitter? I just wish women realized what it takes to be a single guy who really wants to get to know you, but the "getting to know you" is limited to every other weekend. Geez and you wonder why I have gone on multiple dates? Maybe cuz I only see you every other weekend! I would also want to protect my child and not allow him/her to get attached to someone right away, but be fair!! You did it before for someone else...give me that too! Sorry if I sound a little bitter, but the dating life of someone such as myself, with not too many obligations, is a simple life.
The Man
Saturday, June 19, 2010
LOL for the Inner Circle
"One is left with the horrible feeling now that war settles nothing. That to win a war is as disastrous as to lose one." - Agatha Christie
This great debate is separating the boys from the men, the girls from the women and the ignorant and arrogant from the intelligent and sweet souls. Everything happens for a reason, you can't push away what is destine to occur. Spy and pry all you want, continue to protect your crown jewel and we will continue to guard our queen bee. Romeo and Juliet? I think not.
The army continues to grow or maybe it just seems that way. I may have overstepped my welcome and put myself right in the middle of a war I shouldn't be involved in. I've had my laughs, bruised some egos and gotten a wake up call to the bittersweet reality of a ludicrous fairytale.
To say this is a bizarre situation is being nice, but then I should revert back to the people we are discussing. Normal is the ideal, unfortunately most of the world is far from normal. Sooner or later, when you least expect it the walls will come tumbling down.
We haven't been very private about the party we are planning. Would it really matter? If you want to find us you will. Just be warned we have friends here too, in places you least expect. Kate has asked that I stop creating unnecessary drama. That's the polite version, what she really said was, "Jesus Christ woman. Even I'm not that ball zee. " Cheers it is, where everyone knows your name. Welcome to our paradise guys!
I'll let Kate have the floor on this one. Maybe now is the perfect time to tell my back-story. Seems to be the theme around here recently.
SP
This great debate is separating the boys from the men, the girls from the women and the ignorant and arrogant from the intelligent and sweet souls. Everything happens for a reason, you can't push away what is destine to occur. Spy and pry all you want, continue to protect your crown jewel and we will continue to guard our queen bee. Romeo and Juliet? I think not.
The army continues to grow or maybe it just seems that way. I may have overstepped my welcome and put myself right in the middle of a war I shouldn't be involved in. I've had my laughs, bruised some egos and gotten a wake up call to the bittersweet reality of a ludicrous fairytale.
To say this is a bizarre situation is being nice, but then I should revert back to the people we are discussing. Normal is the ideal, unfortunately most of the world is far from normal. Sooner or later, when you least expect it the walls will come tumbling down.
We haven't been very private about the party we are planning. Would it really matter? If you want to find us you will. Just be warned we have friends here too, in places you least expect. Kate has asked that I stop creating unnecessary drama. That's the polite version, what she really said was, "Jesus Christ woman. Even I'm not that ball zee. " Cheers it is, where everyone knows your name. Welcome to our paradise guys!
I'll let Kate have the floor on this one. Maybe now is the perfect time to tell my back-story. Seems to be the theme around here recently.
SP
Truce
Have we gone over to the dark side? For some people our recent posts may have crossed an invisible line and sure we could have let sleeping dogs lie. But, that's just not who we are. We are in it to win it and if we permanently destroy friendships along the way, oh well. The bridges were burning long before we starting writing about them.
Betrayal of trust, of love, of hope changes who you are forever and post trauma life alters. The more pain thrust onto a heart the longer the spiritual and emotional journey. Letting the past go will never happen. Overtime the memories of a life once lived will become few and far between. Ultimately what remains in your heart are the innocent still portraits of a once happy couple. Confusion and frustration forever circle the final images, questions left unanswered, years erased without cause and an arrogant self-pity party shielding the defendant.
I take the blame for allowing M (aka JSR) back into my life. For believing a ring and a marriage license had indeed changed him for the better. I forgave a once bitter past in hopes that this time I would get a prettier closure. It seemed to be working and I truly thought he had matured. I was genuinely happy for him and his new life and I still am, although now the ending is far from pretty. I thought I finally had a proper label as a friend, but then I guess I was only given a temporary label that sooner or later was bound to expire.
In hindsight, the note that started this open diary time capsule perhaps was cut and dry and a simple answer in itself. Had I not been burned before by M maybe I wouldn't still be so bitter.
I never wanted M. I will continue to point this out; I was perfectly fine with the friend label. We had started as merely friends and life was far less complicated that way. Some people think that the fact I decided to send baby gifts makes it seem like I was trying to become the third wheel. That was never my intention and I second-guessed whether it would be taken the wrong way. I'll take any excuse to shop and kids clothes are wicked cute. I'm still great friends with most of my ex boyfriends or "fun guys" and there has never been an issue with their spouses. So, perhaps I came into this renewed friendship with a slightly unorthodox view.
I don't agree with how I was let go and while there is never a sweet way to cut someone out of your life, there are far more noble and ethical choices. If you give someone a second chance and the privilege to be your friend again and then they blindside you and throw you out with the trash well there is no nice way to deal with that pain and embarrassment either. This careless decision is of course at the core of the story of M. In many ways it defines who he is.
Life is a day-by-day learning experience. How I felt last month or last week isn't necessarily the same as how I feel today in regards to certain people. There are cons to posting your thoughts and bitching your frustrations on a permanent page. You sometimes forget about the six degrees of separation or lack of privacy from the cyber wall. I don't regret anything I have written in the past about my feelings for M or about M and company. They are my thoughts. I will apologize for any negative words I may have thrown out about M's father. I'm not a doctor and if I have offended certain people with my words then I'm sorry. I would expect the same apology from the people who threw slandering and bias claims at me.
This was never intended to cause a fight. I had tried so many times to get a more detailed answer and never heard back. I write for myself, for my personal well being. While I can understand how certain people may not agree or approve with me displaying my life for anyone to read, I won't change who I am to please you. I'm a stubborn cookie. I hate that a handful of people are so angry with me, but there is nothing I could have ever done to change the way you feel now.
I wish the past had been left behind. I was quite fine with it like that. I feel bittersweet these days. I realize that with each new post I am burning more bridges and the army is growing. I would love to call a truce and one day is able to sit down and have a drink together. I realize this will never happen and so the story of M continues.
Kate
Betrayal of trust, of love, of hope changes who you are forever and post trauma life alters. The more pain thrust onto a heart the longer the spiritual and emotional journey. Letting the past go will never happen. Overtime the memories of a life once lived will become few and far between. Ultimately what remains in your heart are the innocent still portraits of a once happy couple. Confusion and frustration forever circle the final images, questions left unanswered, years erased without cause and an arrogant self-pity party shielding the defendant.
I take the blame for allowing M (aka JSR) back into my life. For believing a ring and a marriage license had indeed changed him for the better. I forgave a once bitter past in hopes that this time I would get a prettier closure. It seemed to be working and I truly thought he had matured. I was genuinely happy for him and his new life and I still am, although now the ending is far from pretty. I thought I finally had a proper label as a friend, but then I guess I was only given a temporary label that sooner or later was bound to expire.
In hindsight, the note that started this open diary time capsule perhaps was cut and dry and a simple answer in itself. Had I not been burned before by M maybe I wouldn't still be so bitter.
I never wanted M. I will continue to point this out; I was perfectly fine with the friend label. We had started as merely friends and life was far less complicated that way. Some people think that the fact I decided to send baby gifts makes it seem like I was trying to become the third wheel. That was never my intention and I second-guessed whether it would be taken the wrong way. I'll take any excuse to shop and kids clothes are wicked cute. I'm still great friends with most of my ex boyfriends or "fun guys" and there has never been an issue with their spouses. So, perhaps I came into this renewed friendship with a slightly unorthodox view.
I don't agree with how I was let go and while there is never a sweet way to cut someone out of your life, there are far more noble and ethical choices. If you give someone a second chance and the privilege to be your friend again and then they blindside you and throw you out with the trash well there is no nice way to deal with that pain and embarrassment either. This careless decision is of course at the core of the story of M. In many ways it defines who he is.
Life is a day-by-day learning experience. How I felt last month or last week isn't necessarily the same as how I feel today in regards to certain people. There are cons to posting your thoughts and bitching your frustrations on a permanent page. You sometimes forget about the six degrees of separation or lack of privacy from the cyber wall. I don't regret anything I have written in the past about my feelings for M or about M and company. They are my thoughts. I will apologize for any negative words I may have thrown out about M's father. I'm not a doctor and if I have offended certain people with my words then I'm sorry. I would expect the same apology from the people who threw slandering and bias claims at me.
This was never intended to cause a fight. I had tried so many times to get a more detailed answer and never heard back. I write for myself, for my personal well being. While I can understand how certain people may not agree or approve with me displaying my life for anyone to read, I won't change who I am to please you. I'm a stubborn cookie. I hate that a handful of people are so angry with me, but there is nothing I could have ever done to change the way you feel now.
I wish the past had been left behind. I was quite fine with it like that. I feel bittersweet these days. I realize that with each new post I am burning more bridges and the army is growing. I would love to call a truce and one day is able to sit down and have a drink together. I realize this will never happen and so the story of M continues.
Kate
Friday, June 18, 2010
The Story of M
"Everything is based on mind, is led by mind, is fashioned by mind. If you speak and act with a polluted mind, suffering will follow you, as the wheels of the oxcart follow the footsteps of the ox. Everything is based on mind, is led by mind, is fashioned by mind. If you speak and act with a pure mind, happiness will follow you, as a shadow clings to a form." - Buddha
The story I have been writing about is a true story. It's my life. Somedays I wish it was a fictional tale, but today life is good. In the brief few months since we started this blog we have endured harsh criticism and glorious praise. We don't aim to please. How could we? We are writing about our lives not a made up fairytale gone arye. For my part, I have tried from the beginning to maintain a sense of pride and dignity for the people who I don't always portray in the best light.
It doesn't matter what alias name I picked for these people. There will always be a Kate, Marc, Dylan, Charity, John, Summer, J, Andy or any other name in any state (this narrows it down to the United States), be it New York, Florida, Connecticut, Texas or California (Just to name a few) that once dated, had a fling with or was once married to. I would bet any number of these people then took to the Internet and told their stories. So what's to say that the M or JSR I am talking about is indeed the same M or JSR that you know or for that matter that his real initials are MF. I'm sure there are a million other men with the initials MF whom at one time or another lived in the state of Florida and are also cowardly jackasses. Some people think they personally know me and think they personally know the JSR I have been writing about. Perhaps they are correct, but in order for this to be true my name in the real world would have to be Kate. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't?
That's the beauty of a computer and a keyboard; we can be whoever we want to be. Drama and sex sell, so I was excited and intrigued earlier this month when a small group of readers suddenly became overly vocal in regard to our posts. A part of me would have loved the back and forth bitching storm to continue, but the unproductive rant finally ended. Being anonymous has its perks, one of which is the ability to type without caution or concern.
We decided to remove the comment feature for the moment mostly because it was becoming bothersome. Certain comments were more disturbing than hurtful, but nonetheless not pleasant to read. Some people will never learn from their mistakes and others will never forget the repeated bashing to their core. Pain at times is a fabulous feeling. A free falling drug that can grant you the ability to discover sublime happiness. It took me months to get to the end of the dark tunnel. I was skeptical at first about my talent as a virgin writer and slightly afraid to put myself and my life story out for the world to read and be little. People have again tried to break me and for brief moments I was bruised, but if I have learned nothing in the last nine months it's that I'm the lucky one. I may have walked away alone, but alone if far less complicated and far more freeing. I didn't get the guy, but then I never wanted him to begin with. If I was in love with him don't you think I would have named him Prince Charming or The Love of My Life? Instead I named him Jackass Sewer Rat (JSR).
I've given you three months of foreplay, a preview or two of juicy gossip and a scandal. You didn't really think I would put JSR to rest already? We committed to a year; we've still got nine months left. So, with that let the story of M begin.
Kate
The story I have been writing about is a true story. It's my life. Somedays I wish it was a fictional tale, but today life is good. In the brief few months since we started this blog we have endured harsh criticism and glorious praise. We don't aim to please. How could we? We are writing about our lives not a made up fairytale gone arye. For my part, I have tried from the beginning to maintain a sense of pride and dignity for the people who I don't always portray in the best light.
It doesn't matter what alias name I picked for these people. There will always be a Kate, Marc, Dylan, Charity, John, Summer, J, Andy or any other name in any state (this narrows it down to the United States), be it New York, Florida, Connecticut, Texas or California (Just to name a few) that once dated, had a fling with or was once married to. I would bet any number of these people then took to the Internet and told their stories. So what's to say that the M or JSR I am talking about is indeed the same M or JSR that you know or for that matter that his real initials are MF. I'm sure there are a million other men with the initials MF whom at one time or another lived in the state of Florida and are also cowardly jackasses. Some people think they personally know me and think they personally know the JSR I have been writing about. Perhaps they are correct, but in order for this to be true my name in the real world would have to be Kate. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't?
That's the beauty of a computer and a keyboard; we can be whoever we want to be. Drama and sex sell, so I was excited and intrigued earlier this month when a small group of readers suddenly became overly vocal in regard to our posts. A part of me would have loved the back and forth bitching storm to continue, but the unproductive rant finally ended. Being anonymous has its perks, one of which is the ability to type without caution or concern.
We decided to remove the comment feature for the moment mostly because it was becoming bothersome. Certain comments were more disturbing than hurtful, but nonetheless not pleasant to read. Some people will never learn from their mistakes and others will never forget the repeated bashing to their core. Pain at times is a fabulous feeling. A free falling drug that can grant you the ability to discover sublime happiness. It took me months to get to the end of the dark tunnel. I was skeptical at first about my talent as a virgin writer and slightly afraid to put myself and my life story out for the world to read and be little. People have again tried to break me and for brief moments I was bruised, but if I have learned nothing in the last nine months it's that I'm the lucky one. I may have walked away alone, but alone if far less complicated and far more freeing. I didn't get the guy, but then I never wanted him to begin with. If I was in love with him don't you think I would have named him Prince Charming or The Love of My Life? Instead I named him Jackass Sewer Rat (JSR).
I've given you three months of foreplay, a preview or two of juicy gossip and a scandal. You didn't really think I would put JSR to rest already? We committed to a year; we've still got nine months left. So, with that let the story of M begin.
Kate
Thursday, June 17, 2010
A Comment on Comments
This certainly has been a drama filled month and we still have a couple more weeks left. As you may have noticed we have removed the comment feature. As much as we enjoy hearing from our readers that isn't why we write. While we guard our hearts and attempt to protect our well being we are only human. We can't lie; the malicious words and childish rants are hurtful. Whether the intention of these unproductive and slandering comments is in hopes that we will stop writing about certain people then you have failed miserably. Sure it is painful to read rude comments from people you once considered friends and even those from anonymous strangers. But, it won't stop us from writing.
Instead we have decided that if you would like to send us a comment to a recent blog post, whether it be kind words or harsh criticism we would still love to hear from you. But, the forum has changed; please email us personally at chasingtherush@gmail.com with your comments. Just remember there is no anonymous label when you send an email. Even if you have a cute and clever screen name. If we think your comment is noteworthy we will re post it on the blog and if we feel your words are out of line then we will post your email address and name on the blog and fan page. I have a feeling this will cut down on the slandering and unproductive rants that various anonymous readers have been making. Think before you post, you are no longer anonymous when you enter the Love Bites arena.
"You are not entitled to an opinion. An opinion is what you have when you don't have any facts. When you have the facts, you don't need an opinion." - Solomon Short
By the way, I'm not a natural blond.
SP
Instead we have decided that if you would like to send us a comment to a recent blog post, whether it be kind words or harsh criticism we would still love to hear from you. But, the forum has changed; please email us personally at chasingtherush@gmail.com with your comments. Just remember there is no anonymous label when you send an email. Even if you have a cute and clever screen name. If we think your comment is noteworthy we will re post it on the blog and if we feel your words are out of line then we will post your email address and name on the blog and fan page. I have a feeling this will cut down on the slandering and unproductive rants that various anonymous readers have been making. Think before you post, you are no longer anonymous when you enter the Love Bites arena.
"You are not entitled to an opinion. An opinion is what you have when you don't have any facts. When you have the facts, you don't need an opinion." - Solomon Short
By the way, I'm not a natural blond.
SP
JSR Chapter 2
So I wasn't completely truthful a few weeks ago when I said I would be putting JSR and company to rest in the Love Bites archives. There is no love for him anymore so I won't be going down the sweet, Hallmark memory lane. It was at best a dysfunctional train wreck. Two people from two very different backgrounds, randomly crossing paths. Sure there was moments of hot and steamy lust, but in the real world it never could have lasted. The fatal crash had been looming from the start. Like an elephant in the room, no one wanted to openly admit it never would last. Just when I thought we had a chance at a new label, everything shattered into a million little pieces. The mystery that once fascinated and intoxicated me, in death is just as bittersweet and alluring.
I'm going to take a cue from my new inspiration, the fabulously talented Ms. Emily Gould and her book "And The Heart Says, Whatever!" because well her life story is very déjà vu to mine at the moment. All because he couldn't say, "I'm sorry" and answer the simple question why? He will forever endure the embarrassment in hundreds of pages in millions of paperbacks. Of course we all know who "he" is. He even wrote an article attempting to explain his side of the story on Page Six a couple years back.
It's interesting how one minor action can forever change the lives of multiple peoples. In the three years that followed the first fallout with JSR, I wasn't nearly as upset or angry with him. It was what it was. People change and I knew even before that weekend that we were a pipe dream never to come true. It was the mystery that had fascinated me all those years, not the idea of folding his laundry and watching his balls wrinkle and his dick go permanently limp with age. So I moved on and life continued as usual. After about six months he no longer was a thought in my mind or maybe I never wanted to acknowledge to myself that he always would be. I left my past behind and started a new life. Not realizing that the new life I was creating would one day bring JSR back. I could have sent him an email after I saw he was married. But, I chose not to. I wasn't a part of that life and I didn't think it was necessary. There is no room for the "fun girl" in a married man's life. Or is there?
To say I was shocked and surprised to hear from him out of the blue one day is an understatement. I was floored and confused being he was married and all now and if I was merely the "fun girl" and you found your "soul mate" then again why? Because really if that's all I was to you it shouldn't matter how successful I am as I never meant anything to you.
At first I felt bad for the wife. She didn't know about his past and really she never should have. But, JSR brought the past into the present. If I were the wife I would have questioned the renewed old friendship immediately. I am fourteen years younger and all, so you can't really be that clueless as to what label I once had. I have from the beginning always stated that JSR's motives for becoming my friend again are questionable to say the least. I have documentation to back up my claims that perhaps he was looking for a "fun girl" at least online if not in person and to a certain point I was more than happy to amuse his quirky late night thoughts, but I never wanted anything more.
Here's the thing thou, if you sleep with the enemy and read the enemy's emails then you can't call yourself an innocent bystander to the mishandled situation. You were quite aware of my simple question from the start and you along with husband mutually decided to stay silent. In your world perhaps this is deemed appropriate, but in the big city it's far from appropriate and what you see here today is the result of your "mutual" poor decision to close a chapter without explaining why to the person the story was about. But, then the question is what email addresses do you know about?
Furthermore, if you really were so concerned about the privacy of your family and friends then you would have taken a minute and sat down at a computer or picked up the phone all those months ago and at least attempted to explain your actions. Unfortunately, you didn't consider the domino effect and aftermath of your behavior. Even still after discovering the blog and reading bits and pieces of it, you once again mishandled the situation. Instead of politely answering my one and only question you became offensive, throwing slandering and childish words around. Honestly, I would have stopped had you dealt with the situation properly to begin with and again given you a second chance to redeem yourselves after seeing the blog, but now I'm even more anger. You don't care about anyone else but yourselves. You don't think about the feelings of others. In the present I was just a friend, nothing more, nothing less would you end a friendship in an email? I wouldn't, but then again I'm not a coward with any soul.
Kate
I'm going to take a cue from my new inspiration, the fabulously talented Ms. Emily Gould and her book "And The Heart Says, Whatever!" because well her life story is very déjà vu to mine at the moment. All because he couldn't say, "I'm sorry" and answer the simple question why? He will forever endure the embarrassment in hundreds of pages in millions of paperbacks. Of course we all know who "he" is. He even wrote an article attempting to explain his side of the story on Page Six a couple years back.
It's interesting how one minor action can forever change the lives of multiple peoples. In the three years that followed the first fallout with JSR, I wasn't nearly as upset or angry with him. It was what it was. People change and I knew even before that weekend that we were a pipe dream never to come true. It was the mystery that had fascinated me all those years, not the idea of folding his laundry and watching his balls wrinkle and his dick go permanently limp with age. So I moved on and life continued as usual. After about six months he no longer was a thought in my mind or maybe I never wanted to acknowledge to myself that he always would be. I left my past behind and started a new life. Not realizing that the new life I was creating would one day bring JSR back. I could have sent him an email after I saw he was married. But, I chose not to. I wasn't a part of that life and I didn't think it was necessary. There is no room for the "fun girl" in a married man's life. Or is there?
To say I was shocked and surprised to hear from him out of the blue one day is an understatement. I was floored and confused being he was married and all now and if I was merely the "fun girl" and you found your "soul mate" then again why? Because really if that's all I was to you it shouldn't matter how successful I am as I never meant anything to you.
At first I felt bad for the wife. She didn't know about his past and really she never should have. But, JSR brought the past into the present. If I were the wife I would have questioned the renewed old friendship immediately. I am fourteen years younger and all, so you can't really be that clueless as to what label I once had. I have from the beginning always stated that JSR's motives for becoming my friend again are questionable to say the least. I have documentation to back up my claims that perhaps he was looking for a "fun girl" at least online if not in person and to a certain point I was more than happy to amuse his quirky late night thoughts, but I never wanted anything more.
Here's the thing thou, if you sleep with the enemy and read the enemy's emails then you can't call yourself an innocent bystander to the mishandled situation. You were quite aware of my simple question from the start and you along with husband mutually decided to stay silent. In your world perhaps this is deemed appropriate, but in the big city it's far from appropriate and what you see here today is the result of your "mutual" poor decision to close a chapter without explaining why to the person the story was about. But, then the question is what email addresses do you know about?
Furthermore, if you really were so concerned about the privacy of your family and friends then you would have taken a minute and sat down at a computer or picked up the phone all those months ago and at least attempted to explain your actions. Unfortunately, you didn't consider the domino effect and aftermath of your behavior. Even still after discovering the blog and reading bits and pieces of it, you once again mishandled the situation. Instead of politely answering my one and only question you became offensive, throwing slandering and childish words around. Honestly, I would have stopped had you dealt with the situation properly to begin with and again given you a second chance to redeem yourselves after seeing the blog, but now I'm even more anger. You don't care about anyone else but yourselves. You don't think about the feelings of others. In the present I was just a friend, nothing more, nothing less would you end a friendship in an email? I wouldn't, but then again I'm not a coward with any soul.
Kate
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Huddle
I am throwing in a little twist..lol
Me, being the constant thinker I am, has come up with a few scenarios..I have been putting much thought into the upcoming meet and greet.I am at this point undecided as to if I should remain anonymous.Below are a few twists I thought of with my twisted mind.
ONE: what if I reveal who I am, and due to the fact there are over 1,000 readers, someone realizes I was talking about them in one of my stories,then perhaps the drama begins once again.(I am not too worried about this one)
TWO: what if I happen to find someone attractive at the meet and greet.This may be either a really good thing or really bad thing.GOOD: they know more about me than I have told others in the past, and are willing to overlook my past.BAD: they may find me attractive as well but after reading my stories, think I am a jerk.
THREE: what if someone is going there just because of what I write..and somehow think they are the one's who could tame me..But have no real intentions except to say they were with me, for the possibly, to have me write about them.What if I meet someone, have a great time, possibly date. Am I at that point suppose to stop writing? Write about us? Who knows????
I have seen the guest list and WOW!! there are a few that peak my interest..but are they screwed up from a past boyfriend as well?
FOUR: I am actually JSR. I have been writing stories about my friend, borrowed his profile (so that SP & Kate don't know it's me)Or perhaps I am SP's old love interest she wrote about as well.Maybe my friend told me about a blog written by two females, and the stories they were writing about seemed to coincidental to not be me...So I made my move and began talking to one of the writers and BAM, I am now part of my own story.
I guess at times I have way too much free time to just let my mind wonder..
The reality of the matter is that I am just so tired of dating! At times I think that there is someone reading at this very moment saying " I sure wish I could show this guy I am different than all the rest"..I know I am not alone in my thoughts and evidently I have many things in common with the rest of the dating world..Either that or it's funny to read how people go on multiple dates, dislike their ex's, or are on the hunt for "the one".Who really knows the answers to these questions, but I know there is someone out there for all of us.
The Man
Me, being the constant thinker I am, has come up with a few scenarios..I have been putting much thought into the upcoming meet and greet.I am at this point undecided as to if I should remain anonymous.Below are a few twists I thought of with my twisted mind.
ONE: what if I reveal who I am, and due to the fact there are over 1,000 readers, someone realizes I was talking about them in one of my stories,then perhaps the drama begins once again.(I am not too worried about this one)
TWO: what if I happen to find someone attractive at the meet and greet.This may be either a really good thing or really bad thing.GOOD: they know more about me than I have told others in the past, and are willing to overlook my past.BAD: they may find me attractive as well but after reading my stories, think I am a jerk.
THREE: what if someone is going there just because of what I write..and somehow think they are the one's who could tame me..But have no real intentions except to say they were with me, for the possibly, to have me write about them.What if I meet someone, have a great time, possibly date. Am I at that point suppose to stop writing? Write about us? Who knows????
I have seen the guest list and WOW!! there are a few that peak my interest..but are they screwed up from a past boyfriend as well?
FOUR: I am actually JSR. I have been writing stories about my friend, borrowed his profile (so that SP & Kate don't know it's me)Or perhaps I am SP's old love interest she wrote about as well.Maybe my friend told me about a blog written by two females, and the stories they were writing about seemed to coincidental to not be me...So I made my move and began talking to one of the writers and BAM, I am now part of my own story.
I guess at times I have way too much free time to just let my mind wonder..
The reality of the matter is that I am just so tired of dating! At times I think that there is someone reading at this very moment saying " I sure wish I could show this guy I am different than all the rest"..I know I am not alone in my thoughts and evidently I have many things in common with the rest of the dating world..Either that or it's funny to read how people go on multiple dates, dislike their ex's, or are on the hunt for "the one".Who really knows the answers to these questions, but I know there is someone out there for all of us.
The Man
And The Heart Says, Whatever!
Have you ever gotten to the point where unintelligent people are no longer just annoying, but completely brain dead so much so that you become so worked up and pissed off for no real reason? Simply because they aren't talking on the same intelligence level as you and are so ignorant to their mistakes and mishandling of situations that they don't understand why you are so angry in the first place and instead create their own version of the truth in which they suddenly are the innocent party. If I had something to hide do you really think I would be writing a blog? I'm really good at playing the naive little girl, but to be honest it's an act. I'm a calculated businesswoman. Nothing happens by accident.
I have a short temper, I bore easily and I have very little patience for stupid people. Oh and I'm not looking to make any friends on this blog, so I don't care if I have hurt your feelings. If you are looking for a happily ever after, bull shit, sugar coated, Martha Stewart perfect family blog, this isn't it!
I'm not writing in hopes of becoming your friend. I don't need any more friends, especially not superficial, dizzy, ignorant souls. Why are people so intent on peeing on the fun parade? Lord knows there are at least ten million blogs written by people with cookie cutter families who don a monkey leash (aka "husband"). Go read one of those blogs, Anonymous. Leave the fun parade (which, come to think of it, might include some peeing and a few leashes) to those of us who love to bitch.
There should be a warning label when I accept you as a friend. I can be the sweetest, most caring, shoulder to cry on, with the best birthday presents friend, but the minute you piss me off I'll make sure you never ever forget my name. I will go out of my way to put you back into the corner you came from. I can tolerant ignorant people's bitching to a certain point, but when you cross the line and continue to make up stories and never accept responsibility for your actions then I am left with no alternative, which in my case is a public forum. I'm just looking to have some fun at your expense, to have you walking on pins and needles and in the end all I want is an apology. That's all. A simple "I'm sorry." I don't need an explanation for your slandering remarks or cold shoulder or cowardly actions. That's no longer important, all I want to hear is "I'm Sorry." Until that day, which most likely will never happen, you are going to wish you never pissed me off or for that matter ever knew me.
I don't care if I was the "fun girl." I like having fun; I don't want baggage, after all that's the allure isn't it? The freedom to do what you want, when you want, with whomever you want. That's the life I have and if it includes cheesy lines like "painfully, gorgeous heels" so be it. Then again, if I was just the "fun girl" why would you want to be my friend again since you are married and all? If it was strictly for the beaver then why go out of your way to find me again? By the way, how's that adult friend finder working for you?
I'm not here to please you and clearly you never knew me at all, because if you did you would have known that I'm stubborn and the last thing you want is to become my enemy.
Have a sublime night guys!
Kate
I have a short temper, I bore easily and I have very little patience for stupid people. Oh and I'm not looking to make any friends on this blog, so I don't care if I have hurt your feelings. If you are looking for a happily ever after, bull shit, sugar coated, Martha Stewart perfect family blog, this isn't it!
I'm not writing in hopes of becoming your friend. I don't need any more friends, especially not superficial, dizzy, ignorant souls. Why are people so intent on peeing on the fun parade? Lord knows there are at least ten million blogs written by people with cookie cutter families who don a monkey leash (aka "husband"). Go read one of those blogs, Anonymous. Leave the fun parade (which, come to think of it, might include some peeing and a few leashes) to those of us who love to bitch.
There should be a warning label when I accept you as a friend. I can be the sweetest, most caring, shoulder to cry on, with the best birthday presents friend, but the minute you piss me off I'll make sure you never ever forget my name. I will go out of my way to put you back into the corner you came from. I can tolerant ignorant people's bitching to a certain point, but when you cross the line and continue to make up stories and never accept responsibility for your actions then I am left with no alternative, which in my case is a public forum. I'm just looking to have some fun at your expense, to have you walking on pins and needles and in the end all I want is an apology. That's all. A simple "I'm sorry." I don't need an explanation for your slandering remarks or cold shoulder or cowardly actions. That's no longer important, all I want to hear is "I'm Sorry." Until that day, which most likely will never happen, you are going to wish you never pissed me off or for that matter ever knew me.
I don't care if I was the "fun girl." I like having fun; I don't want baggage, after all that's the allure isn't it? The freedom to do what you want, when you want, with whomever you want. That's the life I have and if it includes cheesy lines like "painfully, gorgeous heels" so be it. Then again, if I was just the "fun girl" why would you want to be my friend again since you are married and all? If it was strictly for the beaver then why go out of your way to find me again? By the way, how's that adult friend finder working for you?
I'm not here to please you and clearly you never knew me at all, because if you did you would have known that I'm stubborn and the last thing you want is to become my enemy.
Have a sublime night guys!
Kate
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Fun Parade
As much as I would like to say that the last decade was meaningless, that's just not possible. What I once believed to be the purpose and path of my life isn't true, but I now understand the meaning of all those years that I often wish I could permanently erase. Day by day, year by year the images fade, but honestly I am so thankful JSR is dead and also so thankful I met the illusive ass in the first place. So JSR thank you. I truly mean this, for if it weren't for your cowardly, childish actions I doubt I would have been quite as pissed off to the point I needed to write my hurt and anger out. The serendipitous path of what has become my life path continues. I'm a freaking writer! How surreal. I do have a minor advantage, coming from a family of writers and all, but still the pipe dream is now a reality.
Funny thing is my serendipitous path always seems to come back to JSR. Perhaps he is becoming the mascot for all the lying, cheating, cowardly, douche bag, jackass sewer scum, and idiot men. If you don't want the whole world to know what a stupid ass you are, you should invest in some public relations.
For instead, four years when JSR and I first had a fallout and I was sitting in the airport waiting to board my plane home, I found myself hysterically crying on the phone to my mother because after a three week vacation, a breakup, a cancelled wedding, a cancer scare and then a weekend with the jackass of all jackasses, I realized I needed a change quick. I absolutely didn't want to return to my groundhog job and a home that was cursed with memories. So, sitting there at the Miami airport I had an ephinany and the next day I went into my cushy job and gave notice. I didn't have another job lined up; I didn't have a clue what I wanted to do. I cashed out my 401K took a year off and played housewife to nobody. After a year and little money left I briefly attempted to get a job and quickly realized I would prefer a painful death then work for the man one more day. Which then lead me to seek out a substantial angel loan and open my own business. Which, as a result of my sudden success JSR decided to be my friend again. Which then lead to the Alanis Morissette, baby drive by and then the "breakup" email and then Love Bites and now a party in honor of Love Bites and the roasting of JSR.
I've had a few close friends offering their concerns for my emotional well being when I'm Miami. Perhaps, there is some truth to their worrying. It's always easier to say I'll be fine when I'm sitting here thousands of miles away, but physically walking in the aftermath is a potential emotional landmine. But, I know myself well enough to know that if I didn't feel 110% on I wouldn't be coming back. As of Friday, I will no longer be a resident of the sunshine state. But, that's not to say I won't be staking claim to a new piece of paradise once again.
I've come to a point where the childish and slandering remarks or what could have been an uncomfortable run in with JSR and company no longer bother or hurt me. JSR and company is a ghost to me now, strangers at best. I had feared for a long time what would happen if our paths ever did cross again. I feared the walk by more so then ideal chitchat. But, now they are merely figments of my imagination. There is no fear, no hatred (well okay I'm still very bitter and angry), but most importantly no emotional attachment. It's a pretty awesome feeling. When all of a sudden all the actions you once calculated as to avoid confrontation don't matter. Every movement is no longer calculated; you are free from the worrying and free to live your life as if there never was a past. And the game of life is now for shits and giggles. None of it matters anymore. It's a new city with fabulous new friends and old standbys. I'm beyond words excited to be coming home and to a celebration no less.
"Perhaps it's fate that today, July the Fourth, we will once again fight for our freedom. Not from tyranny, persecution or oppression. But from annihilation. We're fighting for our right to live, to exist. From this day on, the fourth day of July will no longer be remembered as an American holiday but as the day that all of mankind declared we will not go quietly into the night. We will not vanish without a fight. We will live on. We will survive." - Bill Pullman.
It's not July fourth yet, but it will be when I get there and ironically a movie about fighting aliens perfectly describes JSR and company. Go figure.
Kate
Funny thing is my serendipitous path always seems to come back to JSR. Perhaps he is becoming the mascot for all the lying, cheating, cowardly, douche bag, jackass sewer scum, and idiot men. If you don't want the whole world to know what a stupid ass you are, you should invest in some public relations.
For instead, four years when JSR and I first had a fallout and I was sitting in the airport waiting to board my plane home, I found myself hysterically crying on the phone to my mother because after a three week vacation, a breakup, a cancelled wedding, a cancer scare and then a weekend with the jackass of all jackasses, I realized I needed a change quick. I absolutely didn't want to return to my groundhog job and a home that was cursed with memories. So, sitting there at the Miami airport I had an ephinany and the next day I went into my cushy job and gave notice. I didn't have another job lined up; I didn't have a clue what I wanted to do. I cashed out my 401K took a year off and played housewife to nobody. After a year and little money left I briefly attempted to get a job and quickly realized I would prefer a painful death then work for the man one more day. Which then lead me to seek out a substantial angel loan and open my own business. Which, as a result of my sudden success JSR decided to be my friend again. Which then lead to the Alanis Morissette, baby drive by and then the "breakup" email and then Love Bites and now a party in honor of Love Bites and the roasting of JSR.
I've had a few close friends offering their concerns for my emotional well being when I'm Miami. Perhaps, there is some truth to their worrying. It's always easier to say I'll be fine when I'm sitting here thousands of miles away, but physically walking in the aftermath is a potential emotional landmine. But, I know myself well enough to know that if I didn't feel 110% on I wouldn't be coming back. As of Friday, I will no longer be a resident of the sunshine state. But, that's not to say I won't be staking claim to a new piece of paradise once again.
I've come to a point where the childish and slandering remarks or what could have been an uncomfortable run in with JSR and company no longer bother or hurt me. JSR and company is a ghost to me now, strangers at best. I had feared for a long time what would happen if our paths ever did cross again. I feared the walk by more so then ideal chitchat. But, now they are merely figments of my imagination. There is no fear, no hatred (well okay I'm still very bitter and angry), but most importantly no emotional attachment. It's a pretty awesome feeling. When all of a sudden all the actions you once calculated as to avoid confrontation don't matter. Every movement is no longer calculated; you are free from the worrying and free to live your life as if there never was a past. And the game of life is now for shits and giggles. None of it matters anymore. It's a new city with fabulous new friends and old standbys. I'm beyond words excited to be coming home and to a celebration no less.
"Perhaps it's fate that today, July the Fourth, we will once again fight for our freedom. Not from tyranny, persecution or oppression. But from annihilation. We're fighting for our right to live, to exist. From this day on, the fourth day of July will no longer be remembered as an American holiday but as the day that all of mankind declared we will not go quietly into the night. We will not vanish without a fight. We will live on. We will survive." - Bill Pullman.
It's not July fourth yet, but it will be when I get there and ironically a movie about fighting aliens perfectly describes JSR and company. Go figure.
Kate
Smitten
Okay, so I'm official smitten with McDreamy. Over the top, oh my god, I'm the luckiest woman in the world, smitten. Which means I have now set the bar very high, perhaps to the point it's unreachable.
I don't want to reveal to much as I have a feeling a certain mystery man may be onto my secret online life. So, as much as I would love to reveal all the hot and steamy details of my three-day marathon date with McDreamy I fear my words will unmask my real identity.
I will say that the weekend was perfect; everything fell into place at exactly the right time. Walks in Central Park, brunch at a boutique bistro in the village, drinks and extravagant dinners and then one night in with Chinese and Netflix.
I was so sad to see McDreamy go. Cleaning the dirty wine glasses after he left, I wished he could have stayed another night. My luck, in all the time I was living in Miami I don't meet anyone and then the week before I leave I find "Mr. Right." Eligible bachelors surround me and yet the only man I want to be with lives thousands of miles away. How can this possibly work in the long run? Overtime won't the mystery and commuting become bothersome? I can't let my guard completely down, for I fear once I do the dream will be over.
In other news, as you maybe aware Love Bites is turning four months old (yes, I know, super cheesy) and more importantly Kate is finally returning to a ghost free sunshine state. Yippee!! In honor of this fabulous occasion we are throwing a little party for all the Love Bites groupies. I hate to disappoint, but as hard as I've been trying I honestly don't think I will be able to make it down. It would be so much fun to bring McDreamy as my date. But, at last I just can't get the days off or for that matter any dates in general right now. So, for now I'll remain the behind the scenes gal, the orchestra of the festivities and Kate will be the ringleader along with The Man.
What was intended to be an intimate gathering is looking like it has the potential to be a pretty substantial gathering. The RSVPs keep coming in and we are thrilled with the response and interest. Guess we are onto something; maybe the next one should be in New York.
Still working on the location for the Love Bites party, might not be able to go with the original plan if the numbers keep going up. But, I've got another idea so stay tuned for details as the day approaches. Think we should rename the party "Bite This JSR." On second thought, maybe not. LOL.
SP
I don't want to reveal to much as I have a feeling a certain mystery man may be onto my secret online life. So, as much as I would love to reveal all the hot and steamy details of my three-day marathon date with McDreamy I fear my words will unmask my real identity.
I will say that the weekend was perfect; everything fell into place at exactly the right time. Walks in Central Park, brunch at a boutique bistro in the village, drinks and extravagant dinners and then one night in with Chinese and Netflix.
I was so sad to see McDreamy go. Cleaning the dirty wine glasses after he left, I wished he could have stayed another night. My luck, in all the time I was living in Miami I don't meet anyone and then the week before I leave I find "Mr. Right." Eligible bachelors surround me and yet the only man I want to be with lives thousands of miles away. How can this possibly work in the long run? Overtime won't the mystery and commuting become bothersome? I can't let my guard completely down, for I fear once I do the dream will be over.
In other news, as you maybe aware Love Bites is turning four months old (yes, I know, super cheesy) and more importantly Kate is finally returning to a ghost free sunshine state. Yippee!! In honor of this fabulous occasion we are throwing a little party for all the Love Bites groupies. I hate to disappoint, but as hard as I've been trying I honestly don't think I will be able to make it down. It would be so much fun to bring McDreamy as my date. But, at last I just can't get the days off or for that matter any dates in general right now. So, for now I'll remain the behind the scenes gal, the orchestra of the festivities and Kate will be the ringleader along with The Man.
What was intended to be an intimate gathering is looking like it has the potential to be a pretty substantial gathering. The RSVPs keep coming in and we are thrilled with the response and interest. Guess we are onto something; maybe the next one should be in New York.
Still working on the location for the Love Bites party, might not be able to go with the original plan if the numbers keep going up. But, I've got another idea so stay tuned for details as the day approaches. Think we should rename the party "Bite This JSR." On second thought, maybe not. LOL.
SP
Monday, June 14, 2010
Life Goes On
As I mentally prepare to return to a past that no longer exists and a present that will never be the same, I am faced with mixed emotions. Yesterday I was really excited about coming back, but today I've got butterflies. I wish I knew why. There is the obvious, but the thing is recently when I think about the memories of JSR, they are now few and far between. The memories of a once happy friendship have now been replaced with tremendous hatred and a mental detachment, as if he is a stranger again. Which I'm starting to think is a really good thing. That finally I've come to terms with the past and the memories that had been replaying on autopilot for the last year have been erased and the blank canvas from which I started anew is now being carefully drawn on.
I left not to long ago alone and sad and now I will be returning with a small army of friends and a fresh outlook. I'm super excited to hang out with the Love Bites gang and groupies. I don't know what to expect, but then again I never expected to be writing a blog or a book so at this point nothing could surprise me, not even seeing JSR and company. That's the beauty of burying the sewer rats, they no longer exist, and there is no emotional attachment, no feeling at all, just an empty soul walking down the street. Because, if they had a heart to begin with they never would have broken yours.
The mystery of the illusion is often what inspires a masked persona. The Man will be mingling at the Love Bites bash. But, he's still not sure if he wants to reveal his true identity. Perhaps after a few beers he will change his mind. It's looking like the ladies will be in the majority and the first two rounds are on us. So come early, stay until close and bring your friends. Hope to see you there.
Kate Harper
I left not to long ago alone and sad and now I will be returning with a small army of friends and a fresh outlook. I'm super excited to hang out with the Love Bites gang and groupies. I don't know what to expect, but then again I never expected to be writing a blog or a book so at this point nothing could surprise me, not even seeing JSR and company. That's the beauty of burying the sewer rats, they no longer exist, and there is no emotional attachment, no feeling at all, just an empty soul walking down the street. Because, if they had a heart to begin with they never would have broken yours.
The mystery of the illusion is often what inspires a masked persona. The Man will be mingling at the Love Bites bash. But, he's still not sure if he wants to reveal his true identity. Perhaps after a few beers he will change his mind. It's looking like the ladies will be in the majority and the first two rounds are on us. So come early, stay until close and bring your friends. Hope to see you there.
Kate Harper
Back Track to the Ball Drop
What a brilliant idea, hosting a little get together of fabulous friends and new acquaintances. If I'm coming back, I'm coming back with a bang. But, I still think I should stock up on pepper spray and super freaking high heels as protection just in case I run into JSR and company.
I can't remember the last time I hosted a party. More important than what are we eating and drinking, what am I wearing? Would it be too cheesy if I bought balloons? (I'll restraint myself)
I'm actually really excited to return to my second home. It's been a roller coaster winter and spring and when I look back to how this year began I can't believe how far I have come and how much I have grown and learned. It's unfortunate that I now guard my thoughts and emotions like national security and I will never be able to fully trust anyone ever again. These are permanent wounds inflicted by JSR. But, I'm glad I'm not as vulnerable a person anymore, yet also just as terrified because I have nothing to lose now.
I can't believe how quickly the last six months have gone by. I rang in the New Year in New York City with an old friend. We found ourselves at a friend of a friend's apartment in the east village that was decked out in an Andy Warhol theme. The walls were covered in tin foil and there were fifty people jammed into a studio with a DJ. But, the drinks were free and the punch bowl was endless. After the ball dropped, we went back to her apartment, drank some more vodka and talked until the early morning hours.
She is a lawyer for a fancy firm, comes from old money, but hates to shop. Go figure. We were talking about men of course and I was shocked to learn that she was having an affair with her boss, who is married with three kids. The week before he had told her that he was going to tell the wife everything and get a divorce. But, my friend, let's call her Beth, wasn't sure she was ready for the shit storm or for that matter possibly becoming the stepmother to three teenagers. I, of course was going on and on about the evil wrath I now lovely call JSR. Why is it that whenever alcohol is involved, conversations always turn to love, the good, the bad and the ugly? To leave behind a cursed decade requires a large amount of alcohol and great friends. We haven't spoken recently and I'm curious as to what happened. Guess I will find out in a couple weeks.
Back then I was still in shock and attempting to maintain an emotional shield from the pain. I’ve told the story to basically everyone I know and every time I get the same puzzled look. I even asked my parents for advice (which I never ever do) and again the same perplexed reaction. It took me another month before I started to see a therapist, in hope she would unlock the magic answer to the bitter and odd ending. Over time her conclusion was what I had assumed from the start, but she did enlighten me to some odd and disturbing personality traits of JSR and company. In the end, she and everyone else I had originally told the story to be even more perplexed and confused.
I'm going to detour off topic for a moment, because this has been bugging me for a few days now, since I finally sat down and read the comments that had been made by JSR and company a couple weeks ago. I feel the need to put this lovely legal fact out in the open should JSR and company decide to join the conversation again. Before you go making half ass threats about protecting peoples privacy you should know your literary and legal rights (which unfortunately aren't much). If I was so inclined I could go as far as saying JSR's real name, his place of employment and home address. All thanks to this clever little phrase, "Any resemblance to actual events, locales or persons living or dead, is entirely coincidental." Furthermore, stating something generic as JSR lives in the state of Florida and his initials are MF is harmless and meaningless. There are loads more men in the state of Florida with the same initials. However, I would bet there are only a handful of people in the country named Charity. Lucky for you, I don't want to be linked to the real JSR. At least not on this blog, but in paperback that's a different story.
Kate
I can't remember the last time I hosted a party. More important than what are we eating and drinking, what am I wearing? Would it be too cheesy if I bought balloons? (I'll restraint myself)
I'm actually really excited to return to my second home. It's been a roller coaster winter and spring and when I look back to how this year began I can't believe how far I have come and how much I have grown and learned. It's unfortunate that I now guard my thoughts and emotions like national security and I will never be able to fully trust anyone ever again. These are permanent wounds inflicted by JSR. But, I'm glad I'm not as vulnerable a person anymore, yet also just as terrified because I have nothing to lose now.
I can't believe how quickly the last six months have gone by. I rang in the New Year in New York City with an old friend. We found ourselves at a friend of a friend's apartment in the east village that was decked out in an Andy Warhol theme. The walls were covered in tin foil and there were fifty people jammed into a studio with a DJ. But, the drinks were free and the punch bowl was endless. After the ball dropped, we went back to her apartment, drank some more vodka and talked until the early morning hours.
She is a lawyer for a fancy firm, comes from old money, but hates to shop. Go figure. We were talking about men of course and I was shocked to learn that she was having an affair with her boss, who is married with three kids. The week before he had told her that he was going to tell the wife everything and get a divorce. But, my friend, let's call her Beth, wasn't sure she was ready for the shit storm or for that matter possibly becoming the stepmother to three teenagers. I, of course was going on and on about the evil wrath I now lovely call JSR. Why is it that whenever alcohol is involved, conversations always turn to love, the good, the bad and the ugly? To leave behind a cursed decade requires a large amount of alcohol and great friends. We haven't spoken recently and I'm curious as to what happened. Guess I will find out in a couple weeks.
Back then I was still in shock and attempting to maintain an emotional shield from the pain. I’ve told the story to basically everyone I know and every time I get the same puzzled look. I even asked my parents for advice (which I never ever do) and again the same perplexed reaction. It took me another month before I started to see a therapist, in hope she would unlock the magic answer to the bitter and odd ending. Over time her conclusion was what I had assumed from the start, but she did enlighten me to some odd and disturbing personality traits of JSR and company. In the end, she and everyone else I had originally told the story to be even more perplexed and confused.
I'm going to detour off topic for a moment, because this has been bugging me for a few days now, since I finally sat down and read the comments that had been made by JSR and company a couple weeks ago. I feel the need to put this lovely legal fact out in the open should JSR and company decide to join the conversation again. Before you go making half ass threats about protecting peoples privacy you should know your literary and legal rights (which unfortunately aren't much). If I was so inclined I could go as far as saying JSR's real name, his place of employment and home address. All thanks to this clever little phrase, "Any resemblance to actual events, locales or persons living or dead, is entirely coincidental." Furthermore, stating something generic as JSR lives in the state of Florida and his initials are MF is harmless and meaningless. There are loads more men in the state of Florida with the same initials. However, I would bet there are only a handful of people in the country named Charity. Lucky for you, I don't want to be linked to the real JSR. At least not on this blog, but in paperback that's a different story.
Kate
Sunday, June 13, 2010
The Hunt Continues
Online dating sites have begun to run my life! As soon as I wake every morning, I turn on my computer, check all my tabs (which are still open from the night before) read my mail (to see if the one's I really thought were attractive) wrote back. This has become a part of my morning ritual. I can hardly remember a day where I didn't look to see what was going on online.
Am I addicted? I sure think I am, but I keep telling myself "as soon as I meet the right one, I'm done with all of this”. But let's face it it's easy! I live a fast paced lifestyle, don't have too many good friends, or one's that are not married and are allowed to go out with "the single guy", so I choose the online dating highway. The choices are endless; you can pick a location, body types, hair color, education, and so on. But maybe that is the problem...TOO MANY CHOICES. For example: one site you can click yes if you think you would like to meet them, or think they are attractive. Half the work is done for you, if they click "yes" as well, you know the attraction is there. Next, you talk back and forth and see where it goes. But be warned most of the women are scammers from other countries trying to fool you, but sometime just a conversation alone is all I wanted. Then there are the one's like "Photoshop princess" who either alter their photo's to look perfect, or tell you they work out frequently when actually they play WII fit with their kids, while eating a big Mac. Hahaha.You can become just about anyone you want to be online.
Whether online or offline we have become a world where everything is about looks, status, what you own, and who you know. Of course we need physical appearance to be attracted to someone, and many say that is not everything, but would you really take the time to know someone if attraction wasn't there? Is outside appearances a reflection of who you really are? Or just trying to live up to those shows and thinking by buying those expensive shoes, purses, clothes, makeup, boobs, lips, lipo-suction, ass implants, push-up bra's, eating like a bird, buying a dog you can fit in your purse, and trying to find the pair of sunglasses bigger than all your friends is what men really want. What all that screams is ATTENTION, HIGH MAINTENANCE, and rarely satisfied. I have dated hundreds of these sexy silicon seductresses and have learned many things along the way: many of these women have gotten just about everything they have ever asked for, what makes you think you can handle their expenses? Sure they look great as arm candy, but most want to be the center of attention at all times. The first time you are a little short on cash, they complain they never get to do anything. Most take hours to get ready, and don't usually enjoy the simple things in life. We all want to feel wanted by each other, but do you want everyone else to want what you have too? I am just a simple guy who has expensive tastes on some things, I enjoy going out, but at the same time love the "blockbuster nights". I have been on the online dating highway for over a year, had hundreds of dates, I'm sure spent thousands of dollars.... for what??? You women have it easy!! All you really have to think about is what to wear! I am not cheap by any means, but I just get tired of every weekend the same old thing!
This weekend: I went on a date (wasn't really a date, more like a meeting). I had been talking with her for about six months; we were more like friends who wanted to see if there might be a "connection". Dinner went well, she was attractive and also very educated. At the same time, I had two others that, if I wanted to have "fun", I could have. I could have just stayed home, answered my phone, had "fun" with no expectations...but instead I wanted to see if this may be something worth chasing. The sex part is easy...it's the relationship that is the tough part. Many will say I am crazy for not staying home, having "fun", and not spending a dime...But I want more! Am I allowed to be happy for more than a few hours? For many, the thoughts of multiple women who want nothing more than a "good time" would be amazing. As cheesy as this sounds, I just want to wake up with someone that I am happy to be next to, give them a kiss good morning, have breakfast, and have a great day together. Is that too much to ask for? Sure I could do that with the "fun girls" I'm sure they would love the idea...but from the start, I knew they were not the "one's" for me.
So again starts a new week with hopes on finding what's right for me. Maybe I have already met "the one", been talking to her, perhaps she is a friend already...only time will tell.
The Man
Am I addicted? I sure think I am, but I keep telling myself "as soon as I meet the right one, I'm done with all of this”. But let's face it it's easy! I live a fast paced lifestyle, don't have too many good friends, or one's that are not married and are allowed to go out with "the single guy", so I choose the online dating highway. The choices are endless; you can pick a location, body types, hair color, education, and so on. But maybe that is the problem...TOO MANY CHOICES. For example: one site you can click yes if you think you would like to meet them, or think they are attractive. Half the work is done for you, if they click "yes" as well, you know the attraction is there. Next, you talk back and forth and see where it goes. But be warned most of the women are scammers from other countries trying to fool you, but sometime just a conversation alone is all I wanted. Then there are the one's like "Photoshop princess" who either alter their photo's to look perfect, or tell you they work out frequently when actually they play WII fit with their kids, while eating a big Mac. Hahaha.You can become just about anyone you want to be online.
Whether online or offline we have become a world where everything is about looks, status, what you own, and who you know. Of course we need physical appearance to be attracted to someone, and many say that is not everything, but would you really take the time to know someone if attraction wasn't there? Is outside appearances a reflection of who you really are? Or just trying to live up to those shows and thinking by buying those expensive shoes, purses, clothes, makeup, boobs, lips, lipo-suction, ass implants, push-up bra's, eating like a bird, buying a dog you can fit in your purse, and trying to find the pair of sunglasses bigger than all your friends is what men really want. What all that screams is ATTENTION, HIGH MAINTENANCE, and rarely satisfied. I have dated hundreds of these sexy silicon seductresses and have learned many things along the way: many of these women have gotten just about everything they have ever asked for, what makes you think you can handle their expenses? Sure they look great as arm candy, but most want to be the center of attention at all times. The first time you are a little short on cash, they complain they never get to do anything. Most take hours to get ready, and don't usually enjoy the simple things in life. We all want to feel wanted by each other, but do you want everyone else to want what you have too? I am just a simple guy who has expensive tastes on some things, I enjoy going out, but at the same time love the "blockbuster nights". I have been on the online dating highway for over a year, had hundreds of dates, I'm sure spent thousands of dollars.... for what??? You women have it easy!! All you really have to think about is what to wear! I am not cheap by any means, but I just get tired of every weekend the same old thing!
This weekend: I went on a date (wasn't really a date, more like a meeting). I had been talking with her for about six months; we were more like friends who wanted to see if there might be a "connection". Dinner went well, she was attractive and also very educated. At the same time, I had two others that, if I wanted to have "fun", I could have. I could have just stayed home, answered my phone, had "fun" with no expectations...but instead I wanted to see if this may be something worth chasing. The sex part is easy...it's the relationship that is the tough part. Many will say I am crazy for not staying home, having "fun", and not spending a dime...But I want more! Am I allowed to be happy for more than a few hours? For many, the thoughts of multiple women who want nothing more than a "good time" would be amazing. As cheesy as this sounds, I just want to wake up with someone that I am happy to be next to, give them a kiss good morning, have breakfast, and have a great day together. Is that too much to ask for? Sure I could do that with the "fun girls" I'm sure they would love the idea...but from the start, I knew they were not the "one's" for me.
So again starts a new week with hopes on finding what's right for me. Maybe I have already met "the one", been talking to her, perhaps she is a friend already...only time will tell.
The Man
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Hello Fabulous
It seems like the last few blogs have been on the serious side so I thought we could all use a laugh or two or at the very least a glimpse of hope in a sea of sorrow.
As you may have noticed I took my name off the blog. I'm not trying to be anonymous, but I also don't want to be as easily found. Anyone who has been reading our blog up until now knows who I am and knows how to reach me. If you have just stumbled upon our blog, does it really matter what my name is? If you ask me I'll tell you it, but for now it's SP.
I'm a bit obsessed these days with getting Love Bites on the blogs of note. A bit premature I suppose, it hasn't even been three months, and some blogs have been up for years. There doesn't seem to be a concrete means of getting the blogger team to notice one particular blog over another. I've discovered a few really funny and interesting blogs thru this feature and it seems like after becoming a blog of note your site goes gangbusters.
McDreamy is flying in tonight and staying for a long weekend. We talk on the phone almost everyday and in the back of my mind I wonder, is he the real deal? Could he be "the one"? But, whom am I kidding; there is no such thing as "the one." No one is perfect. In fact it seems like the people who appear to be Martha Stewart perfect are in fact the least normal or functional. I’m well aware I'm far from perfect; I've got lots of emotional baggage. But, I try really hard to forget about the pain one person caused me and instead focus on the potential happiness and pleasure I enjoy in the company of my current crush at the moment.
Being the gentleman and all, McDreamy is staying at a hotel. It sounds like he has some lavish surprise weekend planned out and no matter how many Crumbs cupcakes I attempt to bribe him with, he continues to take the fifth.
I've been organizing and re organizing and cleaning. You would be amazed at how quickly my new pad has become a mess. It was starting to look more like a bachelor's lounge than a sophisticated bachelorette's.
McDreamy's plane landed at JFK about half an hour ago, which is a good thing because I've spent the last two hours trying on everything, literally every piece of clothing I own and finally just as I was about to give up (because of course all of a sudden I hate every dress, shoe, blouse and skirt I own) I remember that right before I left Miami I bought this gorgeous royal blue strapless dress with a white skirt and thin black belt, paired with black open toe kitten heels and my favorite black leather jacket. I'm taking him out for dinner tonight. One last look in the mirror. Is it normal to be this nervous? Why am I so nervous? It feels like there is a lot of pressure riding on this weekend. If it doesn't go perfectly, it's over. Probably not the last thought I should have in my mind before I greet him. Wish me luck.
SP
As you may have noticed I took my name off the blog. I'm not trying to be anonymous, but I also don't want to be as easily found. Anyone who has been reading our blog up until now knows who I am and knows how to reach me. If you have just stumbled upon our blog, does it really matter what my name is? If you ask me I'll tell you it, but for now it's SP.
I'm a bit obsessed these days with getting Love Bites on the blogs of note. A bit premature I suppose, it hasn't even been three months, and some blogs have been up for years. There doesn't seem to be a concrete means of getting the blogger team to notice one particular blog over another. I've discovered a few really funny and interesting blogs thru this feature and it seems like after becoming a blog of note your site goes gangbusters.
McDreamy is flying in tonight and staying for a long weekend. We talk on the phone almost everyday and in the back of my mind I wonder, is he the real deal? Could he be "the one"? But, whom am I kidding; there is no such thing as "the one." No one is perfect. In fact it seems like the people who appear to be Martha Stewart perfect are in fact the least normal or functional. I’m well aware I'm far from perfect; I've got lots of emotional baggage. But, I try really hard to forget about the pain one person caused me and instead focus on the potential happiness and pleasure I enjoy in the company of my current crush at the moment.
Being the gentleman and all, McDreamy is staying at a hotel. It sounds like he has some lavish surprise weekend planned out and no matter how many Crumbs cupcakes I attempt to bribe him with, he continues to take the fifth.
I've been organizing and re organizing and cleaning. You would be amazed at how quickly my new pad has become a mess. It was starting to look more like a bachelor's lounge than a sophisticated bachelorette's.
McDreamy's plane landed at JFK about half an hour ago, which is a good thing because I've spent the last two hours trying on everything, literally every piece of clothing I own and finally just as I was about to give up (because of course all of a sudden I hate every dress, shoe, blouse and skirt I own) I remember that right before I left Miami I bought this gorgeous royal blue strapless dress with a white skirt and thin black belt, paired with black open toe kitten heels and my favorite black leather jacket. I'm taking him out for dinner tonight. One last look in the mirror. Is it normal to be this nervous? Why am I so nervous? It feels like there is a lot of pressure riding on this weekend. If it doesn't go perfectly, it's over. Probably not the last thought I should have in my mind before I greet him. Wish me luck.
SP
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)